4. Functional.

 michael phelps

My personal favorite is the functional high. These people have realized that no one cares if you smoke. There’s no need to discuss it or perpetuate some sort of stoner lifestyle. Just casually smoke and do your job. Michael Phelps gets high and wins Olympic gold medals. I’m pretty sure he’s never posted a Facebook status saying “wake and bake.”

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I should add, just because Michael Phelps smokes and wins Olympic medals doesn’t mean you can do it too. Most people get high and watch Seth Rogan movies until they’re late for work. But round of applause to anyone who can light a bong and actually get shit done. Those are the humans we should be looking up to.

Deadseriousness

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