This is the Greatest New York Knicks Season of My Lifetime

I had a huuuuuge Friday night planned. Netflix dropped a brand new season of Is It Cake—the show where contestants bake cakes that look identical to real-life objects, in an attempt to trick celebrity(ish) judges into believing their cakes are real objects.

Sometimes they bake a cake that looks like a tennis shoe. Sometimes they bake a cake that looks like a bowl of potato chips. It’s must-see TV for people who like baked goods, deception and B-level comedians.

But it was Friday night which means it was Friday night Knicks.

My boys flew into The Alamo to take on the French freak, Victor Wembanyama. New York was on a 3-game winning streak, flirting with the 2 seed in the Eastern Conference—which is huge if this team wants to make a deep playoff run and avoid the Boston Celtics until the Eastern Conference Finals.

The game was a disaster from the jump.

Isaiah Hartenstein committed two offensive fouls within the first 3 minutes of the game. It felt like the Spurs made every single shot they attempted while the Knicks dribbled the ball off their own feet. The Knicks were down 21 in the second quarter against the literal worst team in the West.

If you can imagine, I started having a difficult time watching people bake cakes that looked like reptiles and had to focus my full attention on Jalen Brunson—who decided to have a record-scoring night in San Antonio.

The Spurs won 130-126 in overtime thanks to some of the most frustrating referee decisions I’ve ever seen. Jalen Brunson scored 61 points with only 6 free throws. For comparison’s sake, Joel Embiid scored 70 points earlier this season on 23 free throw attempts.

Victor Wembanyama shot 12 free throws. The Knicks, as a team, shot 12 free throws. The Spurs shot 32 total. Again, the Knicks had 12.

I slammed my laptop shut when the game ended with Precious Achiuwa throwing a pass into the front row with about 3 seconds left in overtime. Precious Achiuwa is prone to at least three of these plays a game and they took him off the bench in the most possession of the game expecting him to not do the thing he loves doing.

I had to take a lap around my house.

Until I realized what happened.

I’ve been a Knicks fan for about 20 years and never have I ever been pissed about a late March loss.

The 2024 New York Knicks are the best team of my life.

I started watching around 2002 back when Allan Houston and Latrell Sprewell had the on-court chemistry of the husbands of two Real Housewives being forced to hang with each other at a lunch party for one of the wife’s new wine brands.

Then Isiah Thomas became the president of basketball operations in 2003.

Isiah may have met all the qualifications to be on the Dream Team but was vastly unqualified to run a professional basketball organization. In 2006, the Knicks had the highest payroll in the NBA and the 2nd worst record.

Stephon Marbury, Jamal Crawford and Eddy Curry were my middle school sleep paralysis demons.

Then Carmelo Anthony came to town with two goals: jab step. shoot.

Sure, Carmelo and Amare Stoudamire made the playoffs a few times but at no point did I ever truly believe they could get past LeBron James and the Miami Heat. Shit, they couldn’t even get past David West and George Hill in Indiana.

Carmelo Anthony scored a million points but watching him play basketball was like watching a guy just shoot in an empty gym. Carmelo played like there weren’t 9 other guys on the court with him. It was like standing in Dave and Buster’s and watching a kid with unlimited tokens dominate the pop-a-shot.

I don’t even want to talk about the David Fizdale years.

One season, Emmanuel Mudiay, Dennis Smith Jr, Trey Burke and Frank Ntilikina were in some sort of Hunger Games battle where the winner gets to lead the team to 17 wins and the loser had to sit next to Enes Kanter on the plane.

At no point did I ever care about a March loss the way I did on Friday night watching a game the team honestly should’ve taken lightly. The playoffs start soon and this team is already struggling to stay healthy. A Jalen Brunson twisted ankle and you can throw this whole season in the Gowanus Canal. But this team doesn’t know how to chill.

Leon Rose, the team president since 2020, has gathered a group of guys who only drive 100mph. Julius Randle and Isaiah Hartenstein will lock hands and double clothesline someone. The Villanova boys—Jalen Brunson, Josh Hart and Donte DiVincenzo—play like their college crushes are always sitting courtside. OG Anunoby—when his elbow isn’t throbbing like Tom when he accidentally steps into one of Jerry’s mousetraps—plays like he sleeps in his car and he’ll get a free meal if he locks down his defensive assignment.

Deuce McBride is a junkyard dog they unleash on opposing teams by just throwing a raw steak at midcourt and slicing his chain leash with wire cutters at the opening tip.

Alec Burks and Bojan Bogdanovic are certainly there too.

For so many years, Knicks fans were gaslit into being told the team can’t win unless they get a star, even though Carmelo was a star and the team didn’t win shit, when in reality, all the team needed was a vision and execution on that vision.

Leon Rose and Tom Thibodeau share a basketball philosophy. Thibs needs guys who sneak thumbtacks in their wrist bands and Leon Rose will run through his CAA Rolodex and find the exact guy Thibs needs.

And admittedly, I’ve been critical of Tom Thibodeau. I will never forgive him for how much Elfrid Payton I’ve had to watch. Every player comes to New York and has the best season of their career. Nerlens Noel averaged 2.2 blocks with Thibs.

Never averaged more than 1 a game after leaving Manhattan.

Julius Randle made 2 All-NBA teams, and sure he mostly benefitted from the lack of forwards in the Eastern Conference and the new positionless All-NBA voting will make it impossible for Randle to ever get another one of those but it still happened. I seent it.

Evan Fournier made the most 3-pointers of his career. I feel like I don’t need to get into Jalen Brunson, like, we all obviously see he’s better in New York with Thibs than in Dallas.

Everything is humming. It is a privilege to be pissed about a random loss at the end of the season. So many years of genuine apathy and now my Saturday gets ruined over a jump ball violation. To be so lucky as to care about a team that plays every single game like they will never be allowed to touch a basketball again if they lose.

Thank you to the 2024 New York Knicks for making me want to throw my computer through a wall. I’ll let y’all know when I’m ready to finish Is It Cake.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is this the best New York Knicks team of the last 25 years?  Leave a comment below. Respond on Twitter, Facebook or Instagram. Or shoot me an email at Deadseriousmailbag@gmail.com. Let’s chat, bay-beeeee. 

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