oj simpson

“I Fucked That B Until I Broke Her” -OJ Simpson Describing His Romantic Evening With Kris Jenner

O.J. Simpson bragged that he had steamy sex with Kris Kardashian, his best friend’s wife, during a 1990s hot-tub tryst that ruined their marriages and friendships, claims the disgraced footballer’s former manager.

Simpson said he and his then-wife Nicole, and Robert and Kris Kardashian, were in a Jacuzzi one night while vacationing together, according to Norman Pardo in his new documentary, “Who Killed Nicole?”

Nicole and Robert turned in, leaving O.J., then 44, and Kris, then 36, alone in the bubbling water. Kris and Nicole were also good friends.

“‘O.J. said he stood up, pulled his shorts down and, I’ll give you exactly what he said: ‘Her eyes bugged out of her head and I f–ked that B until I broke her,’” Pardo recounts on camera in a segment previewed exclusively by The Post. (NY Post)

First, everything that OJ Simpson says ought to be taken with the biggest grain of salt. This is the same man who very clearly murdered two people and then pretended like he couldn’t fit a glove over his hand to get away with it.

Real quick, if any guy tells a story about having sex with a woman, it’s probably a lie. But if they also add that the woman’s ‘eyes bugged out of her head’ when she saw your dick, then the guy is no longer talking about his sex life and is now just describing a scene from Blacked.

That being said, let’s go ahead and take this clear lie as truth even though there is no way he banged his friend’s wife in a hot tub like, while their spouses were drying off in the next room.

That’s not how affairs work.

The only real believable part of the story is that OJ would completely misread a social situation and stand up in a hot tub to pull his dick out totally unprovoked. That sounds like his ‘move’.

It’s very Dennis Reynolds of him. The ‘implication’.

He also seems like the type of weirdo who would say the word ‘fuck’ but then censor himself and say ‘B’ instead of bitch. That’s not a man you leave alone in a hot tub with your wife or honestly any woman on Earth.

This new documentary probably shouldn’t have been made because we get it already, OJ was a monster and there is no new information that can add any nuance to his life buuuuut I will be watching every second of it. I am part of the problem.


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TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture. Jerk.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk to the king directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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