Ladies and Gentleman, welcome to the Jacksonville Jaguars bandwagon. Prepare to enjoy the Super Bowl blowout of whatever bum ass NFC team sneaks their way into the game. Imagine Sacksonville murdering poor little Nick Foles.
But first, the Jaguars must topple the defending Super Bowl champions. Cake. Not even worried about it. I suggest you all grab Jaguars gear before it’s too late. Don’t end up on the wrong side of history.
Here are 5 reasons why you should be diving head first onto the Jacksonville Jaguars bandwagon:
1. Fuck the New England Patriots
If you are rooting for the New England Patriots and you don’t live in Massachusetts then you’re an asshole. “I love the team that beats the team from the city I live in every year with the quarterback who is a Trump supporter and the head coach with Aspergers. They’re so fun.”
I don’t have to get into the fact that they get caught cheating every two years. Now, I am very pro cheating. Please believe and understand. Cheat, always. But you can’t be getting caught every single time. No one on planet Earth was even considering the idea that they would be deflating balls yet they still managed to get caught. They must’ve had the equipment managers pumping the balls at midfield like, on the Jumbotron.
Fuck the Patriots.