Tory Lanez Is The Biggest Bitch On Planet Earth

Megan Thee Stallion was one of the fastest rising stars in not just rap but the music industry as a whole. 2019 started with Big Ole Freak coming out that January and the next 18 months pretty much belonged to Meg. She planted her flag in an entire season. Hot Girl Summer was real and it was spectacular.

Fast Forward a year and a half later and now she’s a victim of domestic gun violence because Tory Lanez had to show the world that he was the biggest bitch of them all.

In July, Tory Lanez was arrested on gun charges but the details were unclear. Day by day more information unfolded. Tory and Meg were at a party at Kylie Jenner’s house, as one does. Personally, I would never go to a pool party at Kylie’s house with Tory Lanez but I digress.

Details of the shooting were muzzled mainly because Meg was clearly attempting to protect Tory from further prosecution but eventually went on Instagram Live to tell the world that Tory Lanez indeed shot her in the foot.

Here is what she said on her Live:

“The police come, I’m scared. All this shit going on with the police, the police is shooting motherfuckers for anything. The police was literally killing Black people for no motherfuckin reason…. Do you think I’m about to tell the police that we, n*ggas, us Black people got a gun in the car?

“I didn’t tell the police what happened immediately right then because I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want the police to shoot me because it’s a n*gga with a gun in the car.”

“If you really want to tell the motherfuckin truth, I tried to save this n*gga. Even though he shot me, I tried to spare him. And y’all motherfuckers is not sparing me. That’s crazy. That’s fucked up.”

We still do not truly know the details of what happened but apparently they were in a car together, they got into an argument, she got out of the car and Tory shot at her from the car window before the police arrived and Meg saved him from the cops as her feet bled out.

So while Megan was protecting Tory Lanez from becoming a hashtag and a name on the back of a WNBA jersey, here are the alleged apology texts that Tory sent Meg following the incident:

He wrote, “I know u prolly never gone talk to me again, but I genuinely want u to know I’m sorry from the bottom of my heart.”

His only explanation for the violence … “I was just too drunk.”

In the text, Tory never references “shooting” or a gun, but it is clear he did something he regrets. In his words, “None the less s**t should have never happened and I can’t change what did. I just feel horrible.”

And, he repeats … “Cuz I genuinely just got too drunk.”

Fuck Tory Lanez.

You SHOT a woman and your response was a ‘sorry, I was too drunk’ text. Fuck this unbelievably corny boy who is the same height standing as he is sitting in a chair. Being drunk is not an excuse for abusing women. It’s a reason to stop fucking drinking. How are you drunk with a gun in your hands? How are you firing a weapon at a woman? Just the behavior of the biggest bitch on planet Earth.

It’s a wrap for this guy. Full R Kelly status as far as never wanting to hear his music again. Not going to sit here and tell you that I’ve ever heard his music intentionally and I actually wouldn’t know if I was hearing one but let’s keep it that way. Fuck Tory Lanez.

Also, don’t hang out at Kylie Jenner’s house. She just wants to steal your melanin. You are not safe there.


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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

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