chuck schumer nancy pelosi

These Two Are The Face of the Democratic Party….We’re All Gonna Die

Last night, Donald Trump gave a televised Oval Office address to the American People to discuss the Government Shutdown and The Border Wall.

It was a quick ‘guys, don’t we all hate latinos???’ speech full of racist dog whistling, lying and weird claims about where the money for the wall would actually be coming from.

The whole lying about all of your policies and beliefs thing straight up isn’t cute anymore. With the Government Shutdown looming, people’s livelihoods are at stake now so we’re going to need like, actual information and fucking soon.

If you’re going to interrupt The Big Bang Theory then you need to come better than just staring blankly into a camera and claiming that every illegal immigrant that comes from Mexico is going to rape and murder our virgin daughters.

Then Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi ran to the studio to drop their own diss track.

Chuck and Nancy didn’t really say anything persuasive or important. I feel like they had plenty of time to repair a rebuttal and decided to freestyle in the booth instead.

Donald Trump is probably going to get his Border Wall because these two are the faces of the Democratic party.

These two corpses really went full Helen Lovejoy and hit us with the ‘THINK OF THE CHILDREN. WON’T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE CHILDREN’ while simultaneously looking as if they capture and cook children in a cauldron in order to maintain everlasting life.

Glad everyone took the night to waste all of our time and do absolutely nothing to prevent the Government Shutdown. Donald Trump reminded the world that he hates Spanish people and Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi wanted to remind the world that they look like Batman villains.

Can we just fast forward to when Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is president and Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi are comfortably behind bars at Arkham Asylum planning a prison escape with The Riddler and Trump.





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Written by TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture. Jerk.

E-mail to talk to the king directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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