The Denver Broncos have traded for Joe Flacco in the most lateral movie in the history of history. Replacing Case Keenum with Joe Flacco is the equivalent of replacing Joe Flacco for Case Keenum.
And with every ‘blockbuster’ trade, there are ripple effects. There are winners and there are of course losers.
Here are the 4 winners of the Joe Flacco trade:
1. Lamar Jackson
The keys to the kingdom have officially been handed to Lamar Jackson and rightfully so. He revolutionzied their offense and by revolutionized, I mean he turned the Ravens into a 1940’s leather helmet football team before they invited the forward pass and ironically, before black people were allowed to play.
Lamar Jackson is the next big thing. Or not. But at least the Baltimore Ravens are going all in with him and not half-assing. He has a better chance to succeed without Joe Flacco breathing down his neck.
2. Case Keenum
There is no better job on planet Earth than backup quarterback. You get paid millions upon millions of dollars and take zero of the hits. You don’t get any blame for the team losing. And you get to go out and say ‘I’m a Denver Broncos quarterback’.
Whether Denver keeps him behind Flacco or trades him somewhere else, Keenum is going to be a backup and those direct deposits will still come in every week.
3. Whichever QB They Draft
We must learn from the lessons of recent history. We just watched Joe Flacco get his job stripped by Lamar Jackson, a quarterback who hasn’t even really figured out how to throw a football yet and he STILL snatched Flacco’s job from him.
It’s safe to say, whoever the Broncos draft this year is going to get some playing time because that’s how bad Flacco is.
4. John Elway
John Elway is the greatest quarterback in the history of the Denver Broncos franchise and that won’t be changing anytime soon with Joe Flacco behind center next season.
Shit, we’re about 8 month away from Elway signing himself to a 1-year deal and beating the Oakland Raiders just like the good
And now onto the losers…
1. Denver Broncos
I hate to be that guy who throws out ‘stats’ and ‘information’ and ‘facts’ but here we go.
Joe Flacco won the Super Bowl in 2012. From that moment on he’s statistically been the literal WORST quarterback in the NFL. Like, it’s not even hyperbole. It’s not an
Denver gave up a 4th round draft pick in order to pay $22 million to the worst quarterback in the sport. Laugh out loud.
2. John Elway
Good news: John Elway will continue to be the best player in Broncos history.
Bad news: he just traded for Joe Flacco which means he’ll be unemployed by this time next year.
3. Whichever QB They Draft
- Brock Osweiler
- Zac Dysert
- Trevor Siemian
- Paxton Lynch
- Chad Kelly
Whoever the Denver Broncos draft will get to play this season, sure. Andddd he’ll be out of the league by the time the playoffs start.
4. People Tired of Colin Kaepernick Arguments
Every time an awful QB gets a new opportunity, people run to twitter to shout ‘WHAT ABOUT KAEPERNICK THO’ even though he hasn’t played professional football in years and has shown no real signs of actually wanting to return to the league.
I was totally into having that discussion a couple of years ago. But enough time has passed. The NFL owners won. They got rid of Kap. Let’s move on from that lazy discussion and join hands as an NFL community to all collectively shit on Joe Flacco together.
Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee with your winners and losers of the Joe Flacco trade. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Follow on Instagram so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.