7 Teams That Should Sign Le'Veon Bell

Le’Veon Bell and the New York Jets just had a very public breakup after two years of Adam Gase making it very clear he never wanted him on the roster and proceeding to never include him into Sunday gameplans effectively as if to say ‘see, look how much he sucks’ when in reality he sucks because Gase is intentionally sabotaging his career.

Very cool and normal and regular stuff. Adam Gase: Great Guy. Totally not a sociopath or anything like that.

Anyway, Le’Veon Bell is a free agent now so here are the 7 teams that should sign him”

1. Washington Football Team

Washington is 1-4 and are only 1 game back of winning a division in which the first place team is being led by Andy Dalton. Washington could easily win the NFC East but in order to do so, they’re going to need an actual running back.

Last weekend the Los Angeles Rams just devoured Alex Smith every time he dropped back to pass. If they want Alex Smith to leave the stadium on his own two legs, they need a rushing attack to take the pressure off and slow down the pass rush. Adrian Peterson is gone and Derius Guice beat the shit out of his girlfriend sooo yea, bring in Le’Veon Bell.

2. New England Patriots

I need Bill Belichick to quietly build an All-Star team full of superstars that the league has given up on for absolutely no reason. Cam Newton and Le’Veon Bell could both end up in the Pro Bowl at the end of the year making $11/hr with no sick days and one 15 minute break a day.

3. Kansas City Chiefs

As I’m writing this, there is a report that the Kansas City Chiefs are interested so uh yea, I have to put them on the list for anyone who is just quickly scrolling and not actually reading any of the words so that I can pretend as if I predicted this.

Also, good teams typically go after good players. It’s a crazy strategy but it appears to keep working. Let’s see if it continues.

4. Buffalo Bills

As a lifelong Josh Allen fan, I want to see my baby boy king to succeed and Tuesday night’s 16-42 blow out loss to the Tennessee Titans exposed a huge hole in their team: running the football.

Buffalo ranks 28th in rushing yards per game. Josh Allen is the 2nd leading rusher on the team and he’s not very far off from Devin Singletary. Imagine Allen in the shotgun next to Le’Veon Bell. The defense will have no idea who is the bigger threat knowing Stefon Diggs can just end up 50 yards down the field behind them.

5. Pittsburgh Steelers

Reunited and it feeeels sooo gooooooood.

6. New York Giants

The Giants rank dead last in rushing this season and one of the best running backs of all time is sitting at home extremely available for an extremely discounted price. Saquon Barkley is gone and Devonta Freeman has done a decent job to fill the void but again, the Giants are still last in the league in rushing.

I know a lot of people don’t see the point of adding Bell in a season where they could tank for Trevor Lawrence but that’s exactly why they would make a move like this. They are in the NFC East and could win the division if they win like, 4 games so why not?