mike ford

Mike Ford is Going To Ruin The New York Yankees

Mike Ford is a 27-year old pizza boy from New Jersey who stumbled his way onto the Yankees roster after everyone on the team suffered injuries leaving a weird hole at first base that only a man of his thickness could fill.

Ford is slashing .238/.328/.545 with 10 homers including 5 of those homers in his last 20 at-bats. After a slow start, he’s found his swing and is absolutely punching baseballs into the Hudson River on a regular basis.

Unfortunately, no matter how hard he hits the ball and how he much he’s clearly figured out major league pitching, he will never get playing time over Luke Voit who has a 132 wRC+, 19 homers and 54 RBIs.

Brian Cashman didn’t trade for Edwin Encarnacion to let Mike Ford steal his playing time and make everyone question Cashman even harder for not acquiring a starting pitcher.

Let’s also not forget that Greg Bird is still technically on the roster somewhere rehabbing some injury I refuse to look up right now. Let’s also not rule out the idea of Miguel Andujar working at first base next spring after the emergence of Gio Urshela, an objectively better baseball player.

Mike Ford’s 121 wRC+ is over twice as high as all of the Kansas City Royal’s production at first base combined (59 wRC+). Even if you believe that Mike Ford is hot at the moment, there is no reason to believe that he will ever be as bad as anyone playing first for the Royals.

So needless to say, Mike Ford is going to ruin the New York Yankees.

There’s a 0% chance that Ford is on the Yankees next season. His contract is up at the end of the year and as mentioned earlier, he’s third on the depth chart at best.

We know how this story goes. Ford will for sure end up staying in the American League where he will terrorize the Yankees for the next decade. I can already envision him in a Blue Jays uniform hitting a walk off at Rogers Centre because Aroldis threw a fastball down the middle of the plate for the 5th consecutive pitch fooling no one.

Meanwhile, as Ford singlehandedly destroys the Yankees, Greg Bird will be in pinstripes going 0-for-4 with 2 strikeouts and 2 pop-ups to the second baseman.

Mike Ford is going to ruin the Yankees and I cannot wait. That’s MY first baseman.

*whispers* or he’ll just fade away into nothingness like Tyler Austin who was silently waived by the San Francisco Giants and was picked up by Milwaukee after the Giants tried to trade his ass to fucking JAPAN.


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TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture. Jerk.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk to the king directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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