In case you forgot just how corrupt and inept our government is, here is your latest reminder as they are now handing out cash to the Los Angeles Lakers to help them get through the financial hardships of a nationwide shut down to stop the spread of Coronavirus.
The Lakers applied for a loan through the Small Business Administration’s Paycheck Protection Program which is a part of the government’s $2.2 trillion stimulus package.
If that’s not a strange sentence to you then please read it again. The Los Angeles Lakers applied for a loan through the SMALL BUSINESS administration. Imagine owning a local restaurant or a bakery or some shit and you apply for a loan to help pay your employees during this lockdown and your application is ignored because all of the money went to a billion-dollar company.
To the surprise of no one, the program ran out of funds in the first round of distribution after giving away millions to companies like Shake Shack and the Los Angeles Lakers.
Treasury Secretary and producer of Academy Award-winning Suicide Squad, Steve Mnuchin, came out last week and said that the PPP was intended to help companies that couldn’t afford to pay their employees.
That was a lie.
Instead, a majority of the money was given to publicly traded companies including $80fucking million going to California software company that literally just got out of an SEC investigation into them lying about their financial records.
Just a reminder you didn’t just vote for Donald Trump. You voted for all of his corrupt rich asshole friends who have spent that last four years doing absolutely nothing but helping their fellow corrupt rich asshole friends.
But no, the problem is Mexican immigrants or communism or whatever.
After being caught essentially stealing money from businesses that without a doubt desperately need it more than them, the Lakers decided to pay the loan back. Aw. Heroes. Clap for them at 7pm tonight.
Here’s the statement the Lakers issued today:
“The Lakers qualified for and received a loan under the Payroll Protection Program. However, once we found out the funds from the program had been depleted, we repaid the loan so that financial support would be directed to those most in need. The Lakers remain completely committed to supporting both our employees and our community.”
*wipes hands clean* and that’s that. No further dissection necessary. The Lakers, which according to Forbes are worth $4.4 billion, were just a small business needed some government assistance is all. Nothing evil going on. Please look away now.
This is my favorite song. The wealthy people who have everything love nothing more than to rob poor people, blame them for their own lack of resources and strip them of any sort of government assistance by claiming that they’re just taking advantage of the system while they are the ones who are begging the government to constantly bail them out whenever there is a slight possibility that they’ll have to sell their summer house or their boats in order to pay the employees that they hate.
Fuck the Los Angeles Lakers.
And please use this as a reminder that the government wants to rush everyone back to work so that they don’t have to give the poor any unemployment checks and if thousands of more poors die from this virus then that’s good for companies like the Lakers who’ll be able to get millions without any of the poors making them feel bad about it.