Old Town Road is a trap song about having ‘horses in the back’ or some shit that has lit the internet on fire the past couple of months thanks to kids on Tik Tok wearing cowboy hats attempting to make the other kids in their high school cafeteria laugh.
Old Town Road really took off after Billboard removed it from its Country charts. Damn. You blew it. Billboard. If we didn’t care about Lil Nas X before, we sure as hell care about him now.
If you want to keep black people off the country charts, you have to do that in private. Use the powers that be to ruin his life. Plant a gun in that kid’s glovebox or something.
But you can’t kick him off the charts. Now you have the entire black community rallying behind the kid you were trying to block. The movement got so big that a country music ‘legend’ joined forces for the Old Town Road remix.
Enter Billy Ray Cyrus.
Andddd now this is in my head 24/7. Every time I open up Twitter, it’s blasting out of my phone.
What are we doing here? Why are pretending like this audio meme is an actual good song? Baseball
What worse is that now a new genre of country-trap or hick-hop or whatever lame classification Pitchfork is going to give it. I don’t want to live in a world where people are ironically saying ‘yee-haw’. The best part about being born in [redacted] is that I missed when people said ‘yee-haw’ and meant it. And now that’s being taken from me.
I should mention that Nelly and Tim McGraw had a BANGER back in the day but I was also a dumb child at the time and everything Nelly did was a smash. Shout out to the St. Lunatics.
But let’s talk about Lil Nas X, who 1000% is not Nelly. Lil Nas X was the creator of one of those lame tweet deck Twitter accounts that just copy and pasted popular tweets from less popular accounts.
He was the Twitter equivalent to The Fat Jewish and Fuckjerry Instagram accounts that steal content and get all of the credit for their original ideas.
‘Nas Miraj‘ was his account that can’t be found anymore after Twitter suspended all of those accounts a couple of years ago. As someone who vomits up original content all day long, I will never root for these people who game the system to get ahead like labeling a rap song as ‘country’ to trick algorithms even though the song is trash. Or stealing tweets.
Get Old Town Road out of here and leave this type of music to the experts.
Oh, and get the entire Cyrus family out of here. How many times are we going to allow Billy Ray and Miley to ride the black wave for some clout when their pockets are feeling a little short? BOOO.
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