Dez Bryant Signing With the New Orleans Saints and Immediately Tearing His Achilles Should Teach Us All a Valuable Lesson

The Dez Bryant revenge tour was ready to begin this Sunday andddd now it’s over before it even started. All jokes and memes aside, this sucks. As much shit as Dez was talking on Twitter all season long, he for sure wanted to play football again and now that his achilles is in pieces, it seems like it’s a wrap for the man’s career.

If teams barely wanted him when he had to healthy feet, there’s a zero percent chance that they’ll want him in 18 months when he’s fully healthy. We’ll all remember all of his dropped passes fondly. Would’ve love to see him drop passes in New Orleans but it just wasn’t meant to be.

But in his second practice, Bryant tore his achilles and taught all of us a valuable lesson: never try.

Imagine if he signed the contract and then just showed up on game day? We wouldn’t be talking about his career-threatening injury. Don’t practice. Don’t ever overexert yourself. Do the bare minimum and you’ll thrive.

Want to know why I have two healthy achilles’? Because I never run anywhere. That’s the secret. Never put in any effort. Never get hurt.

Fuck practice.


Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you are never going to put effort into anything ever again. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.


Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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