Derrick Rose Told Me To Kill Myself

“For everybody that think I’m not gonna play the same way, kill yourself’.

Well if anyone who believes that Derrick Rose is going to fall off now that the Minnesota Timberwolves have fired Tom Thibobeau should kill themselves then put me on suicide watch asap.

I watched Derrick Rose every night play for the Knicks as he had no idea where to stand on defense and sailed every pass he threw into the front row. I saw that bum in Cleveland look like he was LeBron’s little whiny brother that kept complaining and their mom forced LeBron to let him play with his friends.

If the only constant in Derrick Rose’s success is Tom Thibodeau, would it really shock anyone if he was playing with Carmelo Anthony for the Shanghai Sharks next year?

Fuck Derrick Rose.

How can my entire Twitter timeline be people ripping R Kelly and Kevin Spacey for being rapists while they simultaneously vote for Derrick Rose, proud rapist?

We already know what’s going to happen. He’s going to do exactly what he’s been doing the last few years. When things stop going well for him, he just no-call no-shows basketball games and vanishes without telling anyone in the organization where he is.

If the new head coach is smarter than Thibs, which isn’t the largest hurdle to jump, then he’s giving all of Derrick Rose’s minutes to Tyus Jones and is actually developing the young point guard in a season that was pretty much over for Minnesota when Jimmy Butler showed up out of shaped and dominated the Starting 5 with four random bench players.

Brb, going to go kill myself.




Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think Derrick Rose is going to fall off a cliff with Thibs gone. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Follow on Instagram so I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.


Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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