Beards have been the wave for the past few years. Every girl is just gushing over a man with pubes on his face. Being a man in 2017 without a beard is like being a man in 1862 without a slave in your backyard. That was an aggressive analogy for Black History Month. I apologize.
Well Colby Rasmus is going out of his way to end the beard fad by personally growing the most disgusting looking in facial hair history. Rasmus looks like he put super glue on his chin and rolled around the floor at a Super Cuts.
Do not be shocked if Colby Rasmus is the star of season 2 of Making a Murderer. He looks like Steven Avery’s stunt double. Whenever a girl says ‘ugh, guys are so creepy’ they are imagining this gross face. If this face gets on the elevator with you, you get off and take the stairs.
Can’t wait to see the Tampa Bay Rays suck again this season. Good news: the Devil Rays will be trash. Bad News: I’m going to see this nightmare face in Yankee Stadium face to face.
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