kirk cousins

$84 Million Later And Kirk Cousins is Still Bitch Ass Kirk Cousins

March 13th, 2018: A day that will live in infamy.

On Thursday night, the Los Angeles Rams stomped out the Minnesota Vikings in a 38-31 victory and yes, you can blame the Vikings defense for letting Jared Goff go out there and do whatever he wanted but this isn’t about Goff or the Vikings D.

No, let’s talk about Kirk Cousins and why this game was the perfect example of why he ain’t the one.

Wow, what a season start by Cousins. The best in Vikings history. 422 yards and 3 touchdowns against the Rams. What a day, right? Stats on stats on stats. Congrats, Cousins can fill the boxscore all day long.

Kirk can seemingly make all of the throws. 1st half Kirk is the best quarterback in the NFL. But once the game is on the line, he wilts and shrivels up in the biggest moments and that was on full display last night as he suddenly started holding the ball for too long and let the Rams pass rush devour him.

That’s the Kirk Cousins I know and love. Down by 7 with less than 2 minutes to go and the chance to lead his team on a Tom Brady/Aaron Rodgers-esque 4th quarter comeback andddd it’s a turnover.

$84 million. Yikes.

The Minnesota Vikings didn’t sign Cousins to that dumb contract to be 1-2-1 after the first month of the season. I know there are many factors outside of Cousins for this record like the fact that they had a kicker that refused to, ya know, make kicks in that tie game against the Packers.

And I’m sure it seems as though I’m being biased and I’m just a Kirk Cousins hater and I assure you, I am. You know who wouldn’t have lost 27-6 against the Buffalo Bills last week? Case Keenum. Good thing the Vikings let him go and put all of their eggs into a basket that has zero career playoff wins.

$84 million.

 

 

 

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TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture. Jerk.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk to the king directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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