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The Houston Rockets are a lot of nonsense.

Tilma Fertilla, one of the poorest owners in the NBA, wealth accumulated through a plethora of Rainforest Cafe cash registers.

Rafael Stone, the GM whose first order of business, acquiring Christian Wood and Kevin Porter Jr, two players later suspended after they were benched early in a game, then refused to check back in.

Stone entered the 2021 NBA Draft with so many options. Selected Jalen Green, Alperen Sengun, Usman Garuba and Josh Christopher, all in the first round.

What a haul.

Usman Garuba injured his wrist, got traded, fell out of the league, nothing special, no one cared.

Josh Christopher slowly faded to the G-League, still chasing the NBA dream fantasy.

Only Alperen Sengun remains on the roster—the awkward, clumsy, clunky big man, fee-fi-foo-ing up and down the hardwood, lumbering. huffing and puffing, and he’ll blow a whole series away.

I wrote that last sentence after Game 1 but I didn’t finish the blog in time, so I’m recycling it here.

Sengun had a great Game 3, highkey.

Here’s what he did trying to keep the Rockets alive:

  • 47 minutes
  • 33 points
  • 15-for-27 shooting
  • 16 rebounds (5 offensive)
  • 6 assists
  • 3 steals
  • 1 block
  • team-high +10

Ran out of gas at the end of OT though…

But we knew Sengun was not good enough, on his own, to get the Houston Rockets past the first round.

Houston lost in the first round last season, wished on a shooting star, received a falling, weird-ass star—Kevin Durant bucket-getter, tweet-sender.

Now, as Durant sits out another playoff game with a new ankle injury, the Rockets are right back where they were before his arrival.

The difference between LeBron and Durant so bright, blinding, the $12.99 sunglasses at the counter won’t protect you from the rays.

LeBron dragging Marcus Smart and Luke Kennard along with him through the time dimension, hidden in the back of a wardrobe, to fight the witch and secure the superpowers that allow him to score 20 and 10 at age 40-hundred.

Durant, panicking, or not even healthy enough to participate when the stakes are highest.

 

Read More: Mikal Bridges Caught Stealing Company Time



LeBron James can’t keep getting away with this

The Lakers come into this series without Luka Doncic, the NBA’s leading scorer, and Austin Reeves, the team’s second leading scorer.

Just Old Man LeBron and some random role players hastily thrown together between the Lakers front office realignment under new management and a Luka Doncic trade offer out of nowhere.

Doesn’t matter.

Lakers win 112-108 in overtime to go up 3-0 with a chance to sweep the Rockets in Houston this weekend.

Here’s what the 41-year-old did to keep the Rockets head under water:

  • 45 minutes
  • 29 points
  • 10-for-22 shooting
  • 4-for-9 from 3
  • 13 rebounds
  • 6 assists
  • 3 steals
  • 1 block
  • 8 turnovers (oh no)

LeBron draws so much focus from his teammates—every guy in the locker room operating at peak efficiency—raising all boats, even transforming his son Bronny into a functional NBA rotation player.

Bronny James scored 5 points. He outscored the entire Rockets bench.

 

 

Can Houston come back and win this series?

No.

But a good place to start would be the return of Kevin Durant.

Houston needs to make LeBron work defensively more.

Attack him directly.

But they need Durant on the wing applying pressure.

If the Rockets offense is reduced to individual isos over and over then they need one of the best iso scorers ever.

If Kevin Durant wants to back up all that shit Getoffmydickerson was talking then he needs a Marty Supreme run.

Durant, anxious to debate his legacy with never-beens online, now has a chance to prove it IRL.

Let’s see what new injury keeps him out of Game 4. Out: Binging the new season of Beef.

 

 

Jaylen Brown is Unstoppable and The Sixers Need Joel Embiid

 


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Lester Lee

Creator of Deadseriousness.com, The Last Sports Blog.

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