Last season, Brian Daboll turned Jaxson Dart into a battering ram, QB-dive spams—shortening the rookie’s NFL lifespan, and actual real lifespan—but quick, easy auto-first downs for a head coach desperate to keep his New Jersey home.
(He did not get to keep his New Jersey home)
Daboll won the 2022 Coach of the Year trophy—9 Giants victories and a playoff win over the Kirk Cousins Vikings, thanks to a similar strategy—Daniel Jones pinball wizarding off linebackers but the chains are moving.
Each season worse than the last—coordinators attempting coup de tats, no clue who the kicker would be week-to-week, Tommy DeVito—purgatory.
But new head coach John Harbaugh, 12 playoff appearances in 18 seasons with the Ravens, a ring—inherited a young, talent-laden squad with a star wide receiver coming off a brutal TWO-surgery leg injury, reluctant to play Week 1 despite doctors clearing him physically.
Malik Nabers, the most “game-time decision” in sports history.
Brian Daboll would’ve wept—begging Nabers to play, pulling on his leg, dragging across the stadium floor, Nabers ignoring him, the ol ball and chain.
John Harbaugh, the vet, the teacher, the leader of men, deployed a different strategy to get Malik Nabers over his fears…
“We were all just chilling on the sideline,” Dart recounted. “It was right before we were supposed to start our walkthrough,” Dart gleefully told reporters, “me and Coach Harbs kind of had some conversations, he’s like, ‘I think once he gets hit for the first time and realizes that he’s okay, then he’s going to feel confident.’ I think in his mind, that triggered, ‘Maybe I should tackle him right then and there.’
“We were all just standing there, and all of a sudden Malik goes down on the ground. Our team’s super protective of him, so we all turned to look and it was Coach Harbs tackling Malik.”
THAT’S MY HEAD COACH.
The rest is history. Malik Nabers brushed off the turf, hit the field for 6 catches and 69 receiving yards in the New York Giants 28-20 Week 1 win over the Dallas Cowboys on NBC Sunday Night Football, in front of all of the hoes.
2nd-year QB Jaxson Dart, left to his own devices freshman year, Daboll not even trying to teach him the fundamentals—now under the learning tree of Harbaugh and Nagy, taking snaps under center like a real-life, profesional quarterback—23-for-29 passing for 230 yards and 3 passing touchdowns along with 11 carries for 54 yards. His name in the MVP sorting hat with Trevor Lawrence, who put up highlights on the Browns and Caleb Williams, who set records on the Panthers.
This is what Giants football looks like when adults run the program—walking the Cowboys down in the second half—a 12-play, 74 yard drive for a touchdown, 13-play, 63 yard drive for a touchdown, and a 12-play, 47 yard drive to run the clock out. Game over. Giants 1-0.
Meanwhile, Cowboys head coach Brian Schottenheimer—who NFL podcasters told me was one of the better coachs in the NFL—can’t seem to keep his team from commiting penalties, 8-costing 85 yards—plus a brutal uncalled facemask call leaving Cam Skattebo bloodied, Dallas looks just as undisciplined and defensively inept as last season but now the offense has joined in the mediocrity.
John Harbaugh is willing to look like the silliest, goofiest moron tackling his players pregame if he believes itl’ll motivate his guys. Nothing but respect for my 2026 NFL Coach of the Year, 63-years old, hit-sticking studs on the sidelines.
Defense wins championships. So do sickos. John Harbaugh is a sicko.
READ NEXT: 7 Biggest Questions Heading Into New York Giants 2026 Season
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