Welcome to the Deadseriousness 2024 NFL Preview where we’re going team-by-team, getting ready for the 2024 season. First, we have the New York Giants. How did 2023 go? Somehow, thanks to the magic of a local Italian boy, the Giants managed to win 6 games after Daniel Jones tore his ACL week 9 behind […]
On April 27th, 2023, Lamar Jackson signed a huge 5-year, $260 million contract. Troy Aikman made $55 million in his entire NFL career. Lamar will be making $51 million to play quarterback in 2026. And now Lamar, like most people in his new tax bracket, is trying to put his boot on a small business […]
This week, Brandon Aiyuk officially requested a trade, after flirting with the idea for years. The San Francisco 49ers aren’t giving him the big payday he believes he deserves and it’s time to find a team that will. He’s coming off the best season of his career scoring 7 TDs and racking up a career-high […]
Mike McCarthy is entering his 5th season as the Dallas Cowboys head coach and suddenly, out of nowhere, it appears McCarthy may have learned something about Cowboys owner, Jerry Jones, that we all already knew: he sucks. According to NFL insider Tyler Dunne, who spoke with a former Cowboys employee, Mike McCarthy is fed up […]
The NBA season is finally over. Wish a team won the championship but unfortunately, there was that massive explosion at Game 5 and the NBA shut the whole thing down and the Celtics 1000% did not win. Anyway, it’s time for the NFL and for me, my Sunday viewing experience is dependent on the quarterback […]
Last year, I wrote about Bill Belichick breaking up with longtime girlfriend, Linda Holliday. I was mostly just using it as an opportunity to hit on Linda Holliday. I still am. Linda, if you’re reading this, call me. But it’s on to the next one for big Billy Belichick as he is reportedly dating 24-year-old […]
CJ Stroud just had one of the best rookie seasons ever. The no. 2 overall pick took a Houston Texans team that, well, earned the no. 2 pick, and not only led them to the postseason but took a first-round W away from the former Texans star QB who was traded to Cleveland because he […]
It’s time for quarterback battles, bay-beeeeee. Training camp is coming and nothing is more interesting to me than seeing the like, 23rd and 31st best QBs in the NFL battling to start for an organization in so much shambles that they are prepared to enter a season with the 31st best QB starting for them. […]
I am a diehard New York Giants fan and I feel like I have no real relationship with the star tight end of the team, Darren Waller. In 1 season with the team, he played 12 meaningless games and caught 52 forgettable passes from any combination of Daniel Jones, Tyrod Taylor and Tommy DeVito as […]
Every season ends with a quarter of the NFL firing their head coaches, quickly followed up by those same teams rushing to hire a replacement as they head into the draft and free agency. But none of these situations are the same. Let’s rank the 7 new NFL head coaches based on who has […]
The 2023 Miami Dolphins won 11 games and were the best passing attack in the NFL. Their vape-dependent head coach, Mike McDaniel, was labeled a genius for somehow devising the master plan to get the ball in the hands of Jaylen Waddle and Tyreek Hill—two of the fastest players in the sport. Genius. Then the […]
Traveling sucks. Taxis and airports and luggage and terminals and gates and Buffalo Wild Wings bars at noon—the whole experience is daunting but life can be made easier if you simply follow some key rules—none of which are bigger than DO NOT SEXUALLY ASSAULT THE STAFF but NFL kicker, Brandon McManus, couldn’t oblige by that […]
Kansas City Chiefs extra point kicker, Harrison Butker, arrived at Benedictine College over the weekend, ready to give the graduating class of 2024 the greatest commencement speech in the history of history. Before these kids enter the workforce, Butker—a man who has made over $18 million by kicking a football a handful of times throughout […]
Comedy Central roasts were dope. Sometimes. Go watch the Bob Saget and Joan Rivers roasts—A+’s. But Comedy Central isn’t really a thing anymore and stand-up comedy in general sort of fell off a cliff thanks to comedians being either too terrified to tell jokes in fear of imaginary internet scorn or too lazy to work […]
2004 was the first season I remember being a New York Giants fan. I paid attention a little the season prior. Jim Fassel was fired after going 58-53-1 in 7 seasons as the head coach. Michael Strahan had 18.5 sacks in 2003. Kerry Collins split time as starting QB with the current host of The […]
Being an NFL GM during draft season seems like hell. You have to sift through scouting reports of hundreds of players, all coming with their own unique circumstances and contexts. Random daily stories planted by 31 other GMs attempting to trick you into altering your plan or simply messing with your head. All eyes are […]
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