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The Bachelorette Recap: Let’s Go On Spring Break

bachelorette spring break

Sometimes I forget how quickly villains are created in The Bachelorette.

We’re only in the second week and we already have one of the guys telling Charity that someone else might be there for ‘the wrong reasons’.

It’s one of my favorite tropes of the series.

Someone appears to be a frontrunner early on.

A jealous dude who doesn’t like how the frontrunner carries themselves begins to turn all of his focus on the frontrunner to the point where he spends all of his alone time with the Bachelorette talking about another guy instead of discussing their relationship.

And then a cocktail party gets canceled because The Bachelorette gets told the front runner may be tricking her and she just can’t handle it right now.

Then everyone involved gets a rose.

Every. Single. year.

Adrian told Charity he believed some guys were there for a Spring Break and weren’t there for the right reasons because they enjoyed themselves in the pool to kill time as Charity was on a date while Adrian sat staring at them pissed.

I never understood this strategy.

Charity is a total stranger to you.

You don’t owe her your undying loyalty and vice versa.

What do you think you gain by running to her and tattling on another guy?

If he’s a true phony, she’ll figure it out.

Or she won’t because literally, everyone on this show is here for clout.

Adrian is weird, man.

Winner of the Week: Brayden

For the second week in a row, Brayden has a one-on-one convo with Charity that should have resulted in him being sent home but somehow, once again, his bullshit made Charity like him even more.

This week, Brayden pulls Charity aside to inform her that he considered quitting when he heard she held the longest kiss in Bachelor history with Joey in front of the other guys on the group date.

In a way, Brayden had a point.

Making out with your boyfriend for over 4 minutes in front of a roaring crowd cheering you two on while several of your other boyfriends have to awkwardly stand there and watch is kind of shitty. That was a move that should’ve been saved for a one-on-one date.

But everyone understands what show they signed up for.

Brayden’s goal was to get power over Charity by saying he was going to leave but didn’t. Super corny behavior but Charity keeps eating it up.

I expect this to be Braydon’s last W.

 

Loser of the Week: Spencer

Farewell, sweet prince. The creepiest single father in the history of this show did not receive a rose. I’ll always remember his eyes staring as if he was seeing God create the first man in his mind’s eye. It was like he was witnessing Perseus slay the Gorgon.

Weirdest Moment of the Week: Beach Dodgeball

The dodgeball game was fine. Nothing special there. But I loved the idea of a public beach dodgeball game with fans standing directly behind the players who are trying to dodge balls. Girls were getting rocketed with balls all game long and not one single producer ushered them over to the sidelines.

What an unintentionally hilarious television program.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


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Written by thelesterlee

Creator of Deadseriousness. Diehard Knicks, Yankees and Giants fan who wants to create a sports and pop culture space that isn't the same copy and pasted AI content you see everywhere else.

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