There is Nothing More American Than Pretending To Care About The FIBA World Cup

Team USA lost 111-113 in the FIBA World Cup semifinals to Germany.

The score looks close but they were down double digits most of the game thanks to Franz Wagner COOKING dudes. Dennis Schroder was stepping into 3’s like Kevin Durant.

There was one play where Daniel Theis caught the ball at the 3-point line, pump-faked Jaren Jackson out of his sneakers and drove past him for a dunk.

The Defensive Player of the Year was getting sonned by Third Reich descendants.

No one on Team USA played defense.

There are German fans who never watch the NBA who now think Dennis Schroder belongs in the Michael Jordan/LeBron James debate.

But at the end of the day, who cares?

We can get jokes off all day.

This team was struggling to beat countries that can’t afford weight rooms.

We lost the World War II revenge game. It happens.

They had a bigger chip on their shoulders. And let’s leave it at that.

Unfortunately, this is America where people have confidently loud (and often wrong) stances on things they have little to no knowledge about.

Get ready for the avalanche of bullshit about USA no longer having the best basketball players in the world and how we need LeBron James and Steph Curry to save this team so we can reclaim our imaginary dominance over the planet via putting a ball in a hoop.

I watched the semifinal game live and had absolutely no emotional response to the end result.

I watched some good basketball today and I am satisfied with my care.

If anyone reading this is truly upset about the result of the fucking FIBA WORLD CUP, I hope you find peace in your next life.

Stephen A. Smith and Skip Bayless are going to be dramatic about the death of basketball and use this weekend’s NFL ratings to prove some meandering point.

Right-wing trolls—who pretend to hate the NBA so they can get online engagement—are going to make some point about the predominantly white teams playing basketball ‘the right way’ even though they don’t watch any basketball and have no idea what the right way to play basketball is.

Austin Reeves was a key player on this team. Think about that. What a silly thing to care about.

Personally, I’m hyped to see USA vs. Canada in the bronze medal game.

As a Knicks fan, all of my sons get to battle.

The outcome of the game doesn’t matter because *whispers* none of these games matter.

They’re all meaningless exhibitions.