I hate the Dallas Cowboys. They dominate national NFL coverage despite not being a genuine Super Bowl contender since I was watching Doug and Rugrats. Yet they still dogwalk my beloved New York Giants twice a year just to spite me, specifically. Dak Prescott has a dart board covered in photos of my beautiful face. […]
Sometimes I wake up Tuesday morning disgusted that I stayed up til midnight watching the Manning brothers awkwardly chuckle through a punt competition. The Dallas Cowboys were never going to beat the Houston Texans, especially with Nico Collins returning, but I thought they’d move the football. And now Cooper Rush throws a Pick pic.twitter.com/0MGWTimljc — […]
On April 27th, 2023, Lamar Jackson signed a huge 5-year, $260 million contract. Troy Aikman made $55 million in his entire NFL career. Lamar will be making $51 million to play quarterback in 2026. And now Lamar, like most people in his new tax bracket, is trying to put his boot on a small business […]
Mike McCarthy is entering his 5th season as the Dallas Cowboys head coach and suddenly, out of nowhere, it appears McCarthy may have learned something about Cowboys owner, Jerry Jones, that we all already knew: he sucks. According to NFL insider Tyler Dunne, who spoke with a former Cowboys employee, Mike McCarthy is fed up […]
I’m putting on my NFL GM hat. This is my tryout. I deserve to be in a front office. But more importantly, I like chaos so let’s make up some random ass trades to make the league more interesting. Here are 3 blockbuster 2024 NFL Draft trade ideas: 1. Minnesota Vikings trade no. 11 and […]
I don’t love writing about these stories, especially when they first break without any real information coming out yet but the star quarterback for America’s team potentially being a sex criminal seems like something that’s worth typing up a few words for. Dak Prescott has quietly been accusing a woman of extorting him out of […]
The entire 2023 NFL preseason has been centered around the San Francisco 49ers and Trey Lance. The moment San Fran announced Sam Darnold would be the QB2 ahead of Lance, all hell broke loose. I think sports fans and the NFL media love pointing out when franchises make very obvious mistakes because it’s an easy […]
Tiffany Gomas is the name of the woman who went viral a few weeks back when she freaked out on an airplane. Longer video of Tiffany Gomas Gomas on the plane. I haven’t seen an alien yet. pic.twitter.com/B8WdCLrPoX — Marty. (@Atwitisborn) August 13, 2023 Gomas lost her sense of reality, screaming “that motherfucker is not […]
After losing to a third-string quarterback in the divisional round, the Dallas Cowboys took an even bigger L when their offensive coordinator, Kellen Moore, took the OC job for the Los Angeles Chargers. Mike McCarthy then announced he’d be handling the playcalling duties but there was still one coach hire that will ensure the Cowboys […]
Odell Beckham Jr. has spent the last month being courted by the Dallas Cowboys, New York Giants and now the Buffalo Bills to join their squads and help them on their quest to win a Super Bowl much like he did for the Los Angeles Rams last year. But what makes this whole recruiting process […]
This week, a photo resurfaced of Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones in 1957 standing in a crowd of white kids shouting at the six black teenagers walking into North Little Rock High School in Arkansas as segregation ended. Wow, so Cowboys owner Jerry Jones was one of the bullies trying to stop his Black classmates […]
The undefeated New York Football Giants take on the Dallas Cowboys home at MetLife Stadium for a Monday Night Football broadcast that will either garner national respect for the unbeaten ball club or lead to a week of every NFL personality mocking them relentlessly for losing to Cooper Rush and them boys. WHITE OUT. OUR […]
People write their winners and losers columns and I am going to solely focus on the losers every week. Not because I’m like a negative guy or miserable or anything like that. It’s just funnier to make fun of Kyler Murray watching more Twitch streams than game film. Here are the 9 biggest losers of […]
Baker Mayfield is one of the worst quarterbacks in the NFL. He’s too small to see down the field over his offensive linemen and sends the worst passes blindly that come nowhere near his receivers. Enter Amari Cooper, his newest victim. Cowboys are finalizing a trade to send WR Amari Cooper and a sixth-round pick […]
Troy Aikman is on a hot streak of ‘old man yells at cloud’ quotes continuing this week with his remarks on a radio show about the Los Angeles Rams and their ‘super team’. “We’ve talked about it — the all-star team just — I’ve never seen it work in the NFL. I know Washington tried […]
It’s finally over. The Giants have fired the most mediocre man on Earth. Jason Garrett is no longer the offensive coordinator in New York. Let’s quickly look at how the Giants offense has performed since Garrett took over in 2020: 17.2 points per game (30th in the NFL) 5.1 yards per play (28th in […]
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