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Although ESPN reported the NBA found no evidence of cap circumvention, about a month later, SpongeBob, the whole operation under water. That report was false—the NBA did determine the LA Clippers broke the rules and here’s a quick list of all the penalties the Los Angeles Clippers face for violating the league’s salary cap rules:

[RELATED: Ramona Shelburne is My Favorite Reporter]

  • Forfeit 5 first-round draft picks, one in each of the 2029, 2030, 2031, 2032, and 2033 NBA drafts.
    {The team will even have to forfeit the Pacers first-rounder in 2029 they got from the Ivica Zubac trade. The Clippers cannot draft in the first round so there will be 29 first-round picks in those drafts.)
  • $30MM Clippers fine
  • Steve Ballmer will be suspended from all league and team activities for one year
  • Clippers president of business operations Gillian Zucker will be suspended without pay for one year. The league stated that she was ” primarily and directly culpable for the impermissible endorsement arrangements” and provided “false and misleading statements to investigators.”
  • Clippers president of basketball operations Lawrence Frank will be suspended without pay for 6 months for “his involvement with the impermissible endorsement arrangements and for approving impermissible expenses incurred by Leonard and his family.”
  • The Clippers organization and personnel will essentially be on probation for the next 5 years. According to the NBA, they’ll be “subject to a compliance and monitoring program overseen by the league office” during that time.
  • Kawhi will be fined $700K. He and business manager Dennis Robertson violated circumvention rules by “pressuring the Clippers to assist him in obtaining off-court income opportunities,” according to the league, which added that Leonard also failed to reimburse the Clippers for personal expenses.

Starting in 2029, the Clippers won’t have their first-round draft pick for a half-decade. Steve Ballmer built a state-of-the-art basketball arena and will be escorted from the premises if his soles touch the cement.

 

 

What did the Clippers do wrong?

According to the league, Ballmer “knowingly” sought to help Leonard obtain off-court income opportunities, approved a business deal he knew was a precondition for Aspiration to enter into its endorsement agreement with Leonard, and failed to “create conditions under which his organization abided by the NBA’s circumvention rules.”

Ballmer, with Kawhi’s Uncle Dennis banging on his front door like the rent’s due, set the Leonards up with several businesses Ballmer worked with in the construction of the Intuit Dome—including a sponsorship from the company that made the Jumbotron.

Jumbotron companies do not have celebrity endorsements. I don’t know anyone shopping for gigantic scoreboards—I don’t think paying Kawhi tens of millions of dollars did anything to bump up future Jumbotron sales.

Apparently, 4 companies were paying Kawhi, and perhaps more, as the law firm hired to investigate this saga says they are still receiving more information.

[RELATED: Steve Ballmer is a Victim, Mark Cuban is a Ball Licker and Kawhi is the GOAT]

 




What’s next for Kawhi?

Back in Toronto like the entire fiasco never happened.

Kawhi tips his cap, struts away from the crime scene unscathed.

Uncle Dennis thrown under the prison like he had any leverage over this billionaire. What was Kawhi going to do if his uncle didn’t get his $10 million off the books? Was Kawhi going to labor strike so his uncle can receive his direct deposits?

His uncle went David v Goliath against the guy who made the iPhone. Respect to Dennis prying 8 figures out the oaf.

But I get it. Uncle Dennis was warned by the NBA and continued holding his ball cup upside down, begging for cash outside Lawrence Frank’s office.

I wish my uncle was securing us multi-millions. God, to be Kai Trump.


Rare NBA W

Adam Silver needed this ruling. With the Trump Administration owning more and more NBA teams (The Magic, the Mavericks, The Sixers owner was at Epstein’s, and now the Lakers), he needed to establish consequences.

[RELATED: Totally Innocent Man Sells NBA Team To State]

The worst people you know own NBA teams now. More than half of NBA ownership is either purchasing bombs to drop on Palestinians or selling them. Adam Silver is dealing with the Axis of Evil now.

As everything in America becomes more privatized, and expensive, and exclusive, only accessed by wealth—we serfs left with the run-off, dregs, recalled diarrhea food, a soon-to-be-sent draft card for us to go die on Iranian soil, man, we needed one of these scammers punished.

A shame it’s for something like salary cap circumvention for an organization that won zero rings in Kawhi’s time there but it’s better than nothing.


Pablo Torre Found Out

Although I only watched the first installment (and the Mark Cuban follow-up), I could not force myself through hours of David Samson and Amin Elhassan riffing. They have “Let me lie about needing to use the bathroom to get out of this convo” energy. No thanks. Too much Roc Marciano I could be listening to—it appears as though Pablo Torre found out.

While ESPN wrote a story from a “source” telling them the NBA’s investigation didn’t find any wrongdoing—a year after Pablo Torre spent hours displaying, piece by piece, evidence of their wrongdoing—the former ESPN employee vindicated while his old place of work churns out lies, billionaire propaganda and Pat McAfee albums.

In a world where the richest people on Earth continue to rob the poorest, in broad day—Trump officially making crime and corruption not only legal but encouraged—it’s cool to see ESPN, like many other institutions, laying face down, ass up, joining in the march toward decay.

Remember when the news used to have news?

 

READ NEXT: 10 NBA Players I Hope Lock Themselves in the Lab This Summer

 

 

 


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Lester Lee

Creator of Deadseriousness.com, The Last Sports Blog.

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