thelesterlee
When the Orlando Magic drafted Jonathan Isaac with the no.6 pick in the 2017 NBA Draft, they thought they were getting a defensive anchor and a rim running big to swat shots away at the basket and dominate in the pick-and-roll.
Instead, they got an injury-prone weenie who has only played 147 games in 6 years. A guy who no one likes and has increasingly become more annoying as his vague, borderline non-existent NBA career has continued.
This week, this dork Jonathan Isaac is launching an ‘anti-woke’ clothing brand called UNITUS.
Retail brands have the freedom to go woke. We have the freedom to create an alternative. UNITUS launches August 2023. Stay tuned🙃 #WeAreUnitus pic.twitter.com/2TIfkVc6Zt
— Jonathan Isaac (@JJudahIsaac) June 2, 2023
“UNITUS is a sports and apparel company and the bases of it for me is freedom,” Isaac said. “You have companies in that field who have made a conscious decision to either attack or undermine Christian values, conservative values. Things like that. And I think they have the free choice to do so, as much as I disagree, but I feel that we also have a freedom to create what we want to create.
The hope is to sign athletes across all different sports and to create a real infrastructure of people who are in the sports world. Moms and dads who want to buy their kids sneakers and clothes but want to give their money to a company that they know is going to work towards bolstering their values.
We can be proud of who we believe in. We don’t have to hide or be ashamed of it. As the day continues to get darker and darker, crazier and crazier, you standing up for what you believe in is only going to get harder but is only going to become more and more necessary.”
What an absolute fucking dweeb.
But we should’ve seen this coming. The signs were there. In his first season in Orlando, Isaac invited all of his Magic teammates to one of his church sermons. Literally, zero (0) of them showed up.
Isaac truly planted his flag atop the loser hill during the bubble. Following the murder of Jacob Blake by the police in Wisconsin, NBA players all elected to wear Black Lives Matters tees during warm-ups and kneel during the National Anthem in protest of police brutality.
Anddd this goofy stood on his tiptoes to let everyone know he was the special one.
I want to quickly take this opportunity to make an important distinction. There is nothing wrong with his faith. Being a Christian doesn’t make Isaac a dork. If anything, I’m jealous of people’s ability to ‘let go and let god’ instead of how I live my life which is in constant dread.
No, my problem with Isaac not kneeling during the anthem or creating a ‘non-woke’ clothing brand is the use of Christianity as a shield for building your own personal brand and grifting to fill your bank account.
Isaac is essentially saying “don’t give your money to these companies who acknowledge the existence of gay and black people. Instead, give your money to me”.
If Jonathan Isaac truuuuuuly believed these companies were turning their back on the god he worships—and mind you, he doesn’t actually believe this—but if he truly believed this then his solution would not be launching a clothing brand and selling fucking joggers.
Some players really should shut up and dribble.
Especially Isaac who played in only 11 games this season and averaged a grand total of 5 points. It is so obvious to me Isaac knows his unimpressive and borderline imaginary NBA career is coming to an end and he is truly to maintain an income and an influence in this conservative community which has shown how willing they are to throw their money at the dumbest shit as long as it has ‘anti-woke’ on the packaging.
Jonathan Isaac and Enes Kanter are going to crush the 2-on-2 CPAC basketball tourney.
What are your thoughts on Jonathan Isaac’s new clothing brand? Whether you support his bullshit or not, reach out. Leave a comment below. Respond or Twitter, Facebook or Instagram. Or shoot me an email at Deadseriousmailbag@gmail.com. Let’s chat, bay-beeeee. Let’s dunk on this dweeb.
