thelesterlee
The Jacksonville Jaguars are winless through 4 games this season and following their last L in Cincinnati, the former Ohio State head coach—Urban Meyer—decided to hit the old streets in Ohio to get his shit off with his former hoes.
Is this why Urban Meyer is trending? 😳 pic.twitter.com/nFg8kUFVli
— Dude In Texas™️ (@ChiefSVP) October 3, 2021
Here is the head coach of an NFL team—that has yet to win a football game—looking blackout drunk and trying desperately not to ejaculate in his Ralph Lauren golf shorts while a young blonde co-ed who is 1000% not his wife rubs her flat Ohio ass on his lap.
Some people might make the argument that perhaps Urban Meyer is far too horny to win football games in the very competitive National Football League.
As a star college football coach, you are the biggest celebrity in town. You are the highest-paid and most respected because you beat Michigan or because all of the money that your team earns from TV contracts and ticket sales could potentially stimulate the economy of entire states. You paid the best high school athletes under the table and you brought them to a National Championship loss to Nick Saban most likely.
But the NFL is a different beast and Urban Meyer still hasn’t figured that out.
Meyer started his NFL tenure by hiring the racist strength and conditioning coach from Iowa and having to fire him a week later because he didn’t realize people didn’t like racists.
He signed Tim Tebow to play tight end even though Tebow was a quarterback and a terrible one. And hadn’t been good since he was 20. Tim Tebow was good 14 years ago. And not a tight end.
The Jaguars are objectively the worst team in the NFL and you can’t use the excuse that they were trash last year so they should automatically be trash this year. Especially when you drafted Trevor Lawrence, a once-in-a-generation quarterback talent. So it must be the fault of the legendary (college) head coach.
*tapping my ear piece* hold on, im being told we now have a video from an alternate video that solves the mystery of urban’s hand! pic.twitter.com/ldpxJemucL
— Don Bellows (@freak_leader) October 4, 2021
Unfortunately for Jacksonville, Urban Meyer is dangerously horny.
It also doesn’t help when his whole brand is being this religious family man who loves his wife and the bible or whatever only to be seen drunk as fuck publically fingering local grad students.
There is nothing wrong with being horny. Shout out to all the coomers out there. Never stop nutting. But being an NFL head coach is a different beast. Instead of watching film, Meyer told his wife he was going out with his bible study class only to rub his boner on some Ohio State teacher’s assistant.
Free Trevor Lawrence.
Thanks for reading. If you have any thoughts, critiques or concerns, drop a comment below or shoot me an email at Deadseriousmailbag@gmail.com. Let’s chat, bay-beeeee.
