We’re closing in on the 2026 NFL Draft. Not the most exciting ever. No big, franchise-altering QBs incoming. Maybe a handful of defensive world eaters but even they’re potential is almost entirely dependent on their draft location. No real aliens in this draft but we’ve got some interesting storylines, nonetheless.
So here are the 7 mosti nteresting storylines heading into the 2026 NFL Draft.
1. How much intel is Dianna Russini just sitting on?
Brutal time of the year for an NFL insider to lose employment.
This is like, arguably their Super Bowl.
This is when GMs are burning phone batteries sending lies to insiders to tweet out, hoping to trick other NFL teams into reowkring their draft boards.
One of their greatest useful idiots sidelined.
Dianna Russini, Out: Too Horny.
I don’t know what her next move’ll be.
No knowledge of her contract and potential non-compete clauses but, I reckon Dianna wasn’t even focused on this draft, spending weekends alone with men who are not her husband.
Russini doesn’t sound too locked in on any other source.
She’ll work for the numerous gambling companies with front-facing media platforms through which they launder their reputations.
Fanduel, Underdog Fantasy, shit, Dianna Russini could be the new face of Kalshi’s podcast department—lord knows these prediction markets don’t give a single shit about ethics.
As someone who’s been fired from every job I’ve ever had, I feel for Dianna.
And as someone who writes about sports for an audience of zero people, maybe I need to start sliding into the sheets with some coaches.
I will burn my life to the ground to meet Kim Mulkey in a dusty Louisiana motel.
2. Who will waste the first 5 years of Jeremiyah Love’s career?
Jeremiyah Love is a guaranteed Top 10 pick.
Amongst the teams with those picks, Las vegas is locked into Fernando Mendoza—Kirk Cousins and Klint Kubiak putting together his crib as we speak, babyproofing the house.
Washington with the 7th pick and Kansas City with the 9th are the only potential playoff teams selecting Top 10 but Love may not fall that low.
Here are the teams who could draft Love:
- New York Jets
- Arizona Cardinals
- Tennesee Titans
- New York Giants
- Cleveland Browns
- New Orleans Saints
Yuck.
Like Saquon Barkley, Bijan Robinson and Ashton Jeanty before him, Love won’t be making his first playoff appearance until several annoying franchise tags and annual trade rumors.
Good luck to that man.
3. Can the New York Giants rebuild their defense in one hour?
After trading the declining, fattening All-Pro DT Dexter Lawrence to Cincinnati, the Giants now have the 5th and 10th picks in this draft.
Last season, Shane Bowen’s defensive strategy seemed to be “once the 4th quarter starts, let the opposing offense do whatever they want”, and shockingly, it led to a ton of losses.
The Giants couldn’t tackle. They couldn’t keep receivers in front of them. They couldn’t finish sacks. Brian Burns had a tremendous individual season but they need real stars on this defense if they ever want to enter a stadium the betting favorites.
Between Sonny Styles, Caleb Downs, Mansoor Delane, and Reuben Bain Jr, the Giants could use their two Top 10 picks to select two foundational defensive anchors, turning them into a dangerous defense in a matter of minutes.
Just ignore that Reuben Bain killed a woman and walked away without consequences on a legal technicality.
Shh.
4. Who will be this year’s Mel Kiper Jr
Last year, Sheduer Sanders, originally projected as a first-rounder, fell to the 5th.
After seeing him play, yea, that’s a 5th round ass motherfucker.
But Mel Kiper turned the entire broadcast into an Alex Jones Infowars-esque crusade—banging the table, calling out the incompetence of every single front office allowing Shedeur to fall to 5th.
Again, NFL insiders be humping for their sources.
Mel Kiper Jr was so obviously stumping for Deion Sanders, misbehaving, throwing a temper tantrum as if to show his buddy Deion how loyal he is via public humiliation ritual.
Dan Orvlosky seems most likely to self-emulate on live television.
Last month, Dan attempted to peddle some bullshit about Ty Simpson being just as good as Fernando Mendoza, leading to Pat McAfee of all people dunking on him for his insincere opinion.
Not to get all dramatic about the state of media and the collapse of the American empire but conflicts of interest, biases and lies have never been more palpable.
Integrity gone Dodo bird.
Who will show their ass this week?
5. Can Ty Simpson sneak into the first round
Speaking of Ty Simpson propaganda, I just read a Todd McShay mock draft where he had Ty Simpson going 12th to the LA Rams.
Interesting.
From what I can tell, this guy sucks. Kenny Pickett-coded. Drew Lock-maxxing.
I understand QBs are the most important commodity in the NFL, supply and demand raising the draft stock of guys who don’t belong in the first but, personally, I’m of the belief Ty Simpson is a backup and you can find one of those playing spring ball in the UFL. Shout out Adrian Martinez.
Wasting a first rounder on a guy who, if cleats touch turf, means you are losing that game, maybe just select a DB who can play the nickel, ya know?
Someone is going to trick themselves into believing Ty Simpson is this year’s Jaxson Dart when in reality, he’s worse than Dwayne Haskins.
Dan Orlovsky is going to lose his shit when Ty goes in the 5th.
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