18 Biggest Western Conference Storylines Heading into the 2023-24 NBA Season

The NBA is a league driven by storylines and narratives so let’s talk about the Western Conference storylines we’ll be waterboarded with when the 2023-24 season starts.

Here are the 18 biggest Western Conference Storylines heading into the year:

1. LeBron Year 21

LeBron James was drafted in 2003. Tracy McGrady led the league in scoring LeBron’s rookie year. McGrady retired in 2013. The Supersonics were still a basketball team. Drake was on Degrassi and had no hoes. Austin Reeves was 5.

And this man got his team to the Western Conference finals last season.

It is absurd that after running up and down a hardwood court for his entire life, this 38-year-old is still capable of impacting wins and losses.

He played 35 minutes a game last year. He played the second most minutes on the Lakers and he only played 55 games. I go back to bed if I wake up with a cough or upset tummy. LeBron’s bones must be on fire whenever it rains and he’s still getting triple-doubles.

2. Chris Paul Joins the Evil Empire

Mike Dunleavy got the job as the new Warriors GM and immediately rushed to get the 38-year-old point guard who has spent the last decade getting his head beat in by Golden State. I don’t personally think there will be any real beef when the season starts. CP3 and Steph are approaching the ends of their careers. I imagine their egos aren’t as powerful as they might’ve been in the past.

The only problem is Draymond Green, who always seems one game away from freaking out on his teammates like when he called Kevin Durant a bitch and the team fought all season.

Or, ya know, when he put Jordan Poole to sleep in training camp and the team couldn’t win any games on the road because Green beat someone up and they all sat quietly like strangers when they traveled together.

Yea, Draymond is going to ruin this, isn’t he?

3. Nikola Jokic: Made Man(?)

Nikola Jokic has two MVPs and now a ring he can’t find. Probably lying under the coach somewhere or behind the fridge.

But if you’re here at Deadseriousness then you already know how the NBA media works. You get a certain level of praise on the way up but once you reach the top, it’s time to start tearing you down.

This could be the season people finally get annoyed at Jokic’s whole “ugh, making millions of dollars to play professional basketball is suuuch a burden for me” shtick where he acts as if he’d rather be yanking baby calves out of pregnant cows than scoring 25 points on Rudy Gobert’s neck. Like, he’s being held at gunpoint to play a game for a living.

I get not wanting the celebrity and fame and microphones in your face all the time but no one has the perfect job. Being an NBA superstar is pretty close to perfect though.

Don’t be shocked when he suddenly gets criticized for things he’s gotten away with in the past. He shoved Markieff Morris from behind and fucked his neck up badly. He shoved the owner of the Phoenix Suns. Jokic is an asshole—which I personally enjoy—but the media might start going through the trash and bringing up the receipts.

4. The Vibe-less Grizzlies

Here’s Dillon Brooks at Houston’s first preseason game:

Dillon Brooks brought his dance moves to Houston 😂🔥 pic.twitter.com/gvs9NVqfGs

— NBACentral (@TheDunkCentral) October 8, 2023

I haven’t seen anyone on the Rockets smile in years and Dillon Brooks came through with some good vibes and positivity.

So where does that leave the Grizzlies locker room? Ja Morant’s gone for the first 25 days which leaves Marcus Smart coming in as the vocal leader day one and Derrick Rose yawning at the end of the bench.

We’re about to see how good Memphis really looks when they’re completely swaggerless for a quarter of the season. After watching Jaren Jackson Jr on the Paul George podcast, I know he’s bringing zero energy to the team.

It’s time to for Luke Kennard to grab the aux. Yuck.

5. Anthony Edwards SZN

At some point, when everyone says Anthony Edwards is set to be the next great American basketball star, it becomes a bit of a self-fulfilling prophecy. The constant praise only turns him into the thing everyone wants him to be whether he actually is that thing or not.

I like Ant and I do hope he reaches the ceiling everyone has built for him but it’s also possible he’s not great enough to be the no. 1 option and lead a playoff team. Or at least, not yet.

He needs to be far more efficient of a scorer and he needs to get to the free throw line wayyyy more but at the same time, I imagine it’s difficult to get to the rim with Karl-Anthony Towns and Rudy Gobert standing in the paint with their defenders next to them.

Disgusting team building happening in Minnesota.

6. Life Outside of Washington

Bradley Beal has been in faux trade talks for so long without ever actually requesting a trade.

Beal had it made in DC.

He made a bajillion dollars, got to be the most important player for an NBA franchise and truly flew under the radar as far as actually winning basketball games go and escaping any real criticism for his decision to pick money and comfortability over championships.

James Harden must hate Beal for getting away with that.

He was a massive fish in a small pond with no expectations and now he’s being dropped onto a team that was in the Finals two years ago and he’s playing alongside Kevin Durant, one of the most polarizing players in the league. There hasn’t been a spotlight on Beal this large since maybe his days at Florida.

Let’s see how Beal plays when people are watching.

7. MVP De’Aaron

De’Aaron Fox in the 4th quarter is the best player in the NBA. With 5 minutes left in the game, Fox blacks out and only sees the ball hitting the bottom of the net. If it wasn’t for a historic 50-point Game 7 by Steph Curry, who knows how far De’Aaron could’ve carried the Kings.

But the Kings didn’t have phone service this offseason. No moves were made. Harrison fucking Barnes is still eating up minutes on this team. Every team is getting better every year and the Kings are just running it back. Uh, bold.

If Sacramento wants to keep lighting beams, De’Aaron Fox is going to need to become and MVP candidate and I think he’s more than capable of getting there.

8. No More What If’s? In LA

This is the 4th year Kawhi Leonard and Paul George have been on the Clippers and the duo has but one Western Conference Finals appearance to show for it. They lost in 5 games to Phoenix.

Mostly, this tandem has been the face of player rest and player empowerment and why players shouldn’t be allowed to do anything going forward. The media hates the players they cover. That’s a conversation for another day.

But I need Kawhi and PG to be healthy because I still believe that at full strength, they are the best pair in the NBA. Kawhi is the best basketball player I’ve ever watched and can completely control everything that happens when he’s on the floor.

Kawhi Leonard ripped Kevin Durant and dunked it. My word.pic.twitter.com/085aUbP74P

— Tomer Azarly (@TomerAzarly) April 19, 2023

A healthy(ish) Kawhi still has enough left in the tank to be the best player on the floor no matter who’s on the other team.

9. Time To Start Reaching All That Potential

I’m about done praising Sam Presti and the OKC Thunder for their excruciatingly slow rebuild. It’s time to win now. Chet Holmgren and Shai Gilgeous-Alexander can win you 40 games on their own. Fuck acquiring draft picks and assets.

Sometimes it sucks knowing my favorite league is full of teams with no intentions of winning. Well, now the Thunder, after years of bullshit, are finally ready to join the playoff race. There is a new team you have to worry about every night.

We don’t talk enough about SGA being 4th in the league in scoring last season with 31.4 points a night.

Here’s what Woj had to say about the Thunder:

“I think there are 4 potential All-Stars in that [Thunder] lineup down the road, and maybe [Chet] Holmgren’s a potential MVP candidate.”

Woj on Oklahoma City’s future 👀

(via @ESPNNBA)pic.twitter.com/EQPXUyKMwF

— ClutchPoints (@ClutchPoints) October 11, 2023

So yea, none of that is true. There aren’t 4 All-Stars on this team. Chet Holmgren will never win an MVP. But I love seeing a new team to be excited about. And let’s enjoy them before there are more people like Woj who describe them like the 73-win Warriors without Chet even playing a single career NBA game.

10. Size Is About To Matter

After acquiring John Collins from the Atlanta Hawks, the Jazz are about to run out a lineup of Walker Kessler, John Collins and Lauri Markkanen. Salt Lake City is a place already aware that size matters except it’s the size of one’s family and the number of wives they acquire. It has yet to translate on the court.

11. Wembanmia

Wemby’s reach for the steal in this play is CRAZY 🤯#PorVida
pic.twitter.com/hkSI210sfF

— Hoops Nation (@_HoopsNation) October 10, 2023

You don’t need me to describe how insane Victor Wembanyama is. The only thing I’ll say is to enjoy every second he’s out there because he won’t be on the floor much. He is going to land on someone’s foot and have an ankle injury for the next 3 years. His body doesn’t make sense and we’ve seen how guys like Kristaps Porzingis are constantly dealing with leg injuries just running up and down the court.

Enjoy Wemby while you can.

12. Zion’s Porn Addiction

Sooooo Zion Williamson had an interesting offseason. He released a gender reveal with his stripper girlfriend only for his porn star girlfriend to go on a week-long, 24/7 tweet streak unloading all of their dirty laundry like how she helped Zion with his diet and how the organization doesn’t fuck with him. It was mostly videos of her BBL but there was some good tea in there too.

Zion is entering his 4th year and it’s time to get serious about his health and his game. He could be one of the most dominant players in NBA history if he simply stopped hitting the Wendy’s drive-thru, stopped trying to sleep with every girl who makes eye contact with him and like, worked on dribbling and shit.

13. Kyrie vs. Reality

So far, Kyrie has been on his best behavior. It probably has a lot to do with Dallas being the only franchise willing to give him a long-term max contract after throwing a Molotov cocktail through the Brooklyn Nets window but he’s saying Dallas is the best place he’s ever worked.

Let’s see how long it takes him to once again sabotage his own career. I beg we never hear his thoughts on Israel but I’m sure he’s looking to find a new antisemitic documentary to promote on his Instagram and then act shocked when people ask him about it.

14. Dillon Brooks Technical Foul Watch

It’s the preseason and Dillon Brooks has already picked up a technical foul for punching someone in the testicles.

Dillon Brooks just got ejected in a preseason game 😅 pic.twitter.com/IiczcEDAvc

— Bleacher Report (@BleacherReport) October 11, 2023

I can’t believe I have multiple Dillon Brooks clips in this article. Nasty work.

But it sounds like Ime Udoka and the Rockets have put the battery in Brooks’s back. He has the green light to go out there and do whatever the fuck he wants and typically the thing he wants to do, more than anything, is chuck up 3’s and slap scrotums.

Dillon Brooks might set a new single-season technical foul record all from punching genitals.

15. Luka MVP time

Luka has played 5 NBA seasons. 4 of those seasons started with preseason hype around him potentially reaching his MVP ceiling and finally becoming the best player in the league. That hasn’t happened yet. Luka really hasn’t even come close.

I like Grant Williams and Seth Curry out there helping Luka. I think Kyrie does his own thing on offense and defense so he’s not attributing to Luka’s MVP campaign. But if this team can win despite the third-best player being Tim Hardaway’s son and the second-best player one tweet away from being suspended for a month, the Luka MVP lane is wide open.

16. Don’t Sleep On Portland

The biggest problem for the Damian Lillard-led Trailblazers was their inability to prevent any team from walking into their building and scoring 120 points. Scoot Henderson looks like he gives a shit. He might be the first dude to slap the floor on defense and not instantly be corny as hell.

Matisse Thybulle is one of the best on-ball defenders. Robert Williams is one of the best rim protectors. Jerami Grant isn’t a chump out there. It might be wartime when the Portland team bus pulls up. Opposing teams might make the mistake of bringing a basketball to a fistfight.

And they have Kevin Knox??? 82-0.

17. KAT’s Final Days in Minnesota

After nearly 10 years in the NBA, I think we kind of all see what Karl-Anthony Towns is. And more importantly, we see what he’s not. Whenever he gets a microphone near him, he says things that let you know he doesn’t have the right mental makeup to win meaningful basketball games.

He thinks people will look back and say KAT changed the way basketball is played and yes, basketball historians will remember Karl-Anthony Towns as one of the guys who cared more about his stats than the final score.

I don’t know what’s a good fit for KAT but it can’t be a role of any importance. Maybe the Suns can flip Jusuf Nurkic and some picks for Towns where he can be the 4th option and any tiny good thing he does gets celebrated and the bad stuff is forgiven because the headline will be about Durant and Booker combining for 100 points.

18. Who Gets James Harden?

I think I can say with complete confidence James Harden will not be playing for the Philadelphia 76ers this season and I’d also assume Daryl Morey isn’t letting Harden stay in the Eastern Conference knowing firsthand what that man can do on a basketball court.

So which Western Conference team is going to pull the trigger on the former MVP?

The Clippers are still calling but aren’t willing to move mountains for the aging superstar whose entire offensive advantage has been removed from the game with recent rule changes.