I Was The 920th Guy Bonnie Blue Slept With in 24 Hours And I Had a Lovely Time

I’ve always wanted to be a part of history but I was born too late to storm the beaches of Normandy and born too early to help Earth win the Galaxy Wars against the Martians.

Over the weekend, I was finally able to secure my place in American history for generations to remember me.

I helped porn star, Bonnie Blue, sleep with 1,057 guys in 24 hours to break the previous record of 919 but I wasn’t just one of the guys.

I was the 920th, THE tie-breaker.

I will always be remembered as the 920th penis inside of a woman within a 24-hour period.

So lol at anyone who thought I couldn’t reach my potential. I’m the freaking records books now.

I know last month, fellow porn star, Lily Phillips, created a documentary about her sleeping with 100 guys in a day that ended with her looking like she was visited by death one night but bargained her way out of dying by agreeing to steal the souls of 100 unsuspecting men in exchange for ten more years added to her life.

But Bonnie Blue was cheerful as ever after banging 10 times as many people.

NEW: ‘OF content creator’ claims to have set a world record by having s-x with 1,057 men in 12 hours

‘This is what my face looks like after taking 1,000 men less than 12 hours ago’

Bonnie Blue, 25, reportedly beat Lisa Sparks’ record of 919 men in 24 hours by having s-x with… pic.twitter.com/T4dEElp9p6

— Unlimited L’s (@unlimited_ls) January 13, 2025

See, it was a normal, pleasant experience for all 1,058 of us packed into one bedroom with a line going down to the front door.

When no. 919 was finished, I was rushed in to immediately go next as time was our greatest enemy that day.

Yes, the room smelled like a Division II college football locker room after an 8-overtime game in 90-degree heat and half the team running out of their parent’s money so they couldn’t afford new body wash or deodorant.

On the way out, we each got a squirt of hand sanitizer and a business card with the QR code for Bonnie Blue’s OnlyFans.

As the 920th man, the literal tie-breaking penis, I thought I’d receive some sort of plaque or award for my contributions but I reckon time will recognize me as a hero.

I also met a ton of cool guys that day.

So many cool, normal people that signed up to sleep with a porn star alongside 999 strange men.

On the way there, you think to yourself “How many guys can actually drop everything to rush to this random woman’s flat to put their weiner inside of her for like, 30 seconds max?” and it turns out, 1,057 of the chillest bros showed up.

I will admit it burns when I urinate now and I have a brand new cough I didn’t have last week but it’s probably just that damn Covid-19 vaccine the government forced us to take. Thanks, Biden and Bill Gates and George Soros and DEI.

I’m sure all 919 guys before me were super healthy guys, like, there’s nothing healthier—physically or emotionally—than waiting in line behind 900 other men for a chance to experience what a vagina must feel like moments after giving birth to octuplets.

Bonnie Blue, if you’re reading this, thank you for the opportunity to participate in this historic moment and maybe call me.

I thought we had a nice little connection.

Like, we really hit a vibe before you closed your eyes and said “Let’s get this over with”.

Text me, bb.

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