Watching West Coast games is a burden. Typically, I just hope there’s a blowout so I can sneak off to bed at halftime—like Friday night when the Phoenix Suns stuffed the Golden State Warriors in a locker and took their lunch money. But on Thursday night, I decided to stay up til 1am watching the […]
When Zion Williamson is healthy and focused and on the court without Wendys BBQ sauce packets falling out of his pockets, he is an unstoppable force. Zion is a once in a generation athlete whose career has been grounded by his DoorDash history, and insatiable lust for mentally unwell porn stars and knee ligaments you […]
America desperately needs an underdog to step up and fight for all of us who are tired of being censored on social media. Elon Musk is the beacon of hope guiding us into a brighter future. Whether it’s by getting us to Mars or getting us in Dark Knight Batmobile-inspired trucks that look like they’d […]
I’m embarrassed by New York fans who still chant “Fuck Trae Young” at sporting events because he beat an Elfrid Payton-led Knicks team in 5 games in the first round of the 2021 playoffs—as if Reggie Bullock was about to lock down the Giannis that scored 50 points to win the NBA Finals that season. […]
FULL TRADE DETAILS: Las Vegas Aces receive: — Jewell Loyd — No. 13 pick in 2025 Draft Los Angeles Sparks receive: — Kelsey Plum — No. 9 pick in 2025 Draft Seattle Storm receive: — No. 2 pick in 2025 Draft — Li Yueru https://t.co/Gcqgh1vgcd — Bleacher Report (@BleacherReport) January 27, 2025 Absolute blockbuster trade […]
Mariano Rivera may be the greatest pitcher of all time. I know he only pitched one inning a night but every pitch he threw landed in a mitt. You could not score runs against this alien. The New York Yankees don’t win all those championships without Mariano making professional hitters look like me in the […]
I’ve watched a lot of football, mostly teams flying into Jersey and beating up the locals like Ronny and The Situation—but a lot of football nonetheless. The 2025 NFC Championship game between the Eagles and Commanders introduced a rule I had never considered existed. Philadelphia ran Washington out of the game with a 55-23 victory […]
Monday morning is tough for all of us but no one had a rougher one than Selena Gomez—who went opened up her Instagram app to post herself crying about her Mexican people being under attack by the Trump administration sending ICE out to round up anyone with an accent and send them to [insert name […]
The New York Jets have found their next head coach: Detroit Lions defensive coordinator, Aaron Glenn. Let’s gooooooo! OFFICIAL: We’ve agreed to terms with Aaron Glenn to become the Head Coach of the New York Jets. — New York Jets (@nyjets) January 22, 2025 Historic day for people who, for some reason, still think the […]
This year’s NBA trade deadline is February 6th, 3pm Eastern. So far, all we’ve got is Dorian Finney-Smith and Nick Richards changing teams. The NBA is dry as hell at the moment. Not on the court. On the court we’re witnessing some of the best basketball I’ve ever watched but I want to shake the […]
The no. 1 seeded Detroit Lions were eliminated in the divisional round of the playoffs this weekend following a 45-31 loss to the Washington Commanders. With the naked eye, it looked like Jared Goff was point-shaving as he could not stop giving the ball to the Commanders but we were actually witnessing the bond between […]
The 2024-25 NBA season started with the Boston Celtics blowing out the New York Knicks 132-109, tying the record for the most made 3’s in a game and creating the avalanche of indolent, concern-trolling about TV ratings and the NBA product being watered down by too many perimeter shot attempts. The NBA is fine but […]
Last week, Mark Zuckerberg went on the Joe Rogan podcast looking like a surburban coke dealer’s favorite client, and said he believed companies need more ‘masculine energy’. “I think a lot of the corporate world is pretty culturally neutered,” Zuckerberg said during his nearly three-hour conversation with Rogan, adding, “Masculine energy is good, and obviously, […]
The Chiefs beat the Texans. The Commanders beat the Lions. The Eagles beat the Rams. And the Bills beat the Ravens. The 2025 NFL Divisional Round was both full of surprises and also exactly what should’ve happened. We had a lot of snow, a lot of Saquon Barkley and we even lost and got back […]
Last night I was waterboarded with crude AI images of some combination of Patrick Mahomes, Andy Reid and/or Travis Kelce cuddling up with the referees. Apparently, the NFL is rigged. The Kansas City Chiefs beat the Houston Texans 23-14, advancing to another AFC Championship Game with some eye-rolling calls randomly gifting the Chiefs chunks of […]
It’s difficult to win a Super Bowl in the National Football League. Every player, coach, exec, trainer, ball boy and bus driver has to be locked in on the mission at hand. You can’t have a wide receiver reading self-help books on the sidelines because he only caught 1 pass. As of right now, the […]
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