Monday Night Football, 3-1 Jacksonville hosting the defending AFC Champions; Super Bowl runs require Super Bowl confidence—a quality escaping the Jaguars since their 1995 birth. I’m older than the Jaguars. I just gave myself the ick. Hospice care soon cometh.
A victory over Patrick Mahomes, Andy Reid, the Chiefs, in Primetime; Peter Parker with the symbiote, shooting finger guns at hunnies down Broadway-levels of confidence.
Trevor Lawrence, 2021 no. 1 overall draft pick, college football champion, long-mained prince of the sport; had a 22-38 career win-loss record coming into this season, one playoff appearance in his sophomore campaign—threw 5 fucking interceptions, never made it back.
Suddenly surrounded with sustainable support; an offensive line keeping Lawrence on his feet, a defense defined by urgency, dynamic receivers capable of adjusting in midair to snag imperfect throws, a modern head coach whose future will be defined by their success (or faliure) with him; Trevor Lawrence’s 2025 was on the line.
He wins, Jacksonville becomes a media darling. 4-1— filling the gap opened by the Chargers MASH unit. The Bills and Ravens—beatable like any other team. The Colts—one Callie Irsay-Gordon prior engagement away from all hell breaking loose on their sidelines without the empress micromanaging her serfs.
He loses, Jacksonville, once again a laughing stock, butt of the joke, paper tigers; “Why did they trade up to draft Travis Hunter?”—the Chiefs are back, “Have you heard Taylor Swift’s new album? She sings about Travis Kelce.”
Trevor almost blew it.
After back-to-back, 3-play punts, Jacksonville marched down the field to top the 4th quarter.
Trevor Lawrence tries to dive over the D-line and fumbles at the one-yard line. Brutal for the Jaguars.#Jaguars #KCvsJAX #NFL #AggregateSports pic.twitter.com/oPu5wUDxDv
— Aggregate Sports (@AggregateSports) October 7, 2025
Trevor Lawrence fumbles on the goal line.
But Trevor rebounded.
Second half starts with an 87-yard drive for a touchdown, 14-14, tie game. Lawrence hit Travis Hunter with a 44-yard slingshot.
The second half, a Trevor Lawrence showcase.
All of his tools, his strengths, his intangibles.
All of his warts, his weaknesses, his vulnerabilities.
Trevor, in the most important game of his life, stakes through the roof; hitting receivers the second they’re open, morphing into a bowling ball, using his speed and size to lead the team with 54 rushing yards and 2 touchdowns tucking it.
Orchestrating an offense like some of our greatest composers, Brady, Brees, Manning, all em.
But also, a silly delay of game call, some genuine awkward male protagonist clumsiness and yea, you can’t fumble the ball at the 1, man.
The final play, 38 seconds left on the game, neeeed a touchdown to win.
All of Trevor Lawrence’s strengths and weaknesses exploded out of him at the same time—but for the first time in his NFL career—his strengths have outgrown his weaknesses.
TREVOR LAWRENCE UNREAL 😱
Go-ahead TD in the final seconds ‼️ pic.twitter.com/qZ75CwU4tZ
— ESPN (@espn) October 7, 2025
Trevor Lawrence fell. Twice.
Panicking like a child fallen into a gorilla enclosure, finding the poise to thrust his way into the endzone for the win.
Yesterday, I said it was time to declare Baker Mayfield the MVP. Today, Trevor Lawrence is right behind him.
Trevor Lawrence caught picking his nose 😭 pic.twitter.com/pCx1s3imE4
— BricksCenter (@BricksCenter) October 7, 2025
Boogered up.
“Fuck You, Pay Me”-Devin Lloyd
3 years as a productive NFL starting linebacker, 100+ tackles every season, quick hands to bat passes down, an urgency to produce turnovers. Not enough for Jacksonville to offer Lloyd a new contract.
Entering 2025, his 4th straight year as a starter, Devin Lloyd is playing to win, I’m sure. Winning is dope.
But also playing for cash money, ain’t nothing funny.
A 99-yard pick-six off Patrick Mahomes in Primetime might get you a new house.
Devin Lloyd’s 99-yard pick-six swung the Jaguars’ win probability by 42 percentage points (28% to 70%).
Lloyd has now added +95.4% in win probability across his league-leading 4 interceptions, more than 2x the next closest defender.#KCvsJAX | #DUUUVALpic.twitter.com/RW7wAT5hzC
— Next Gen Stats (@NextGenStats) October 7, 2025
Devin Lloyd leads the NFL with 4 interceptions (and with a fumble recovery, leads the NFL in turnovers created).
Perhaps at age 27, the 2022 first-round draft pick, figured out the game.
Lloyd may become the type of game-altering playmaker the Green Bay Packers gave Dallas all thoe first round picks to acquire.
Going into Week 6, Jacksonville has the 8th-ranked defense in the NFL.
Barring a plane crash, they’re going to the playoffs.
Devin Lloyd will be under more microscopes, lining his resume with INTs, deflected passes, QB hits, tackles; prepared to write an absurd number on a napkin to slide to the GM sitting across the desk. And when the GM is done cursing, they’ll shake hands as Lloyd heads out to purchase the dumbest thing anyone’s ever purchased.
Pay Devin Lloyd.
Time for Turning Point USA, Harrison
God put Harrison Butker to spread the good word, keep women and blacks from diversifying the workplace and to fuck up kicks.
To start their final, game-winning drive, the Jaguars got a Harrison Butker stimulus package.
Kickoff out of bounds.
Penalty.
Ball at the 40.
This season, Butker has made 76.9% of his field goals, good for 24th best in the NFL.
Even better, he ranks dead last in extra point percentage. Chiefs better off going for 2 every touchdown.
Harrison—one of the worst kickers in the NFL—seemingly always smiling in the background of a Donald Trump White House photo-op, moments after Trump signs an executive order to prevent gay people from owning homes or making medicine illegal.
Following the death of Charlie Kirk, Harrison went out of his way to praise Charlie for being such a great guy or whatever.
I think it’s time to just do it.
I recognize NFL paychecks hit like crazy but go do the podcast about wanting politics out of sports while exclusively talking politics because it gets attention and praise because you’re “telling the truth” and saving the world and blah blah.
Harrison Butker is so close from being the worst kicker in the NFL to one of the best bootlickers in the world.
Thanks for reading.
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