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The Pimp Bomb: Fantasy Booking AEW Collision With The 2004 WWE Roster

From predicting the first ever women’s gauntlet match to fantasy booking AEW Collision with 2004 WWE roster, welcome to the Pipe Bomb.

aew collision

Welcome to The Pipe Bomb, where we discuss the latest news and events from the wrestling world, both inside and outside the ring. This week we have Kenny Omega dream matches, AEW women’s gauntlet preview and fantasy booking Collision.

 

7 Kenny Omega Matches I Need To See in 2025

I was about to write a review of WWE’s debut on Netflix but this is the first Pipe Bomb in a long time and I don’t want to enter the new year with hate in my heart.

You can read some of my thoughts over here in this Hulk Hogan article about him getting booed but yea, no. I’d rather not spend my Monday nights waiting a half hour between matches as random people get interviewed in the crowd and Travis Scott comes out vaping with Jey Uso.

I’m here for wrestling—not so much wrestler’s entrances.

So let’s swing the pendulum the other way.

Instead of talking about WWE turning into a 3-hour commercial for WWE, let’s talk about the return of the GOAT, Kenny Omega.

Here are 7 matches I need Kenny Omega to have in 2025:

Honorable Mention—Jon Moxley: Having never watched New Japan Wrestling because, ya know, I live in New York and speak English, I had only seen clips of Kenny Omega. Heard whispers of his accomplishments. But Kenny hadn’t wrestled in the United States until AEW formed and I was immediately locked into Kenny’s war with Jon Moxley.

Every single time these two men have gotten in the ring together, magic has happened. Even that time the explosive barbed wire did not explode. It was still a moment in wrestling history.

I want/need another rematch between these two sickos but it’s only an honorable mention because it feels inevitable at this point. It’s like me wishing Kenny and the Young Bucks get back together. I just gotta wait, like, 4 weeks.

1. Swerve Strickland: I mean, duh.

Swerve Strickland had the best year of his career—of most wrestler’s careers—while Kenny Omega was attached to tubes, fighting for his life.

Swerve is doing his job right now—getting the audience to embrace Lashley and Richochet but like, I need Swerve doing something meaningful ASAP.

Whether it’s against Kenny Omega or MJF, just please give Swerve a more important story than “guy who signals to the audience that it’s okay to like these former WWE guys”.

2. Shelton Benjamin/Bobby Lashley: Shelton came into AEW and instantly became an automatic 5-star match machine. I’d love for his resume to include a Kenny Omega match. We’re about to see the best version of a guy who wrestled with his arm tied behind his back for 21 years in WWE.

Omega vs. Brian Cage is coming this Wednesday. It’s big deal. I know that because AEW keeps telling me it’s a big deal.

I love seeing Kenny against a big man. Brian Cage is cool and perhaps this match will give him an opportunity to impress the bookers over there but since we’ll never see Kenny Omega vs. Brock Lesnar, perhaps Omega vs. Lashley is the next best thing.

3. Samoa Joe: I don’t know what Samoa Joe’s wrestling future is.

He has nothing left to prove and I imagine his big ass knees hurt.

But if we can get the world title off Jon Moxley and into the hands of Samoa Joe or Kenny Omega so these two maniacs can go sicko mode for an hour, we’d see one of the greatest matches in AEW history.

4. Speedball Mike Bailey: I think I scrolled past a story saying Mike Bailey is signing with MLW. Respect.

Some folks genuinely prefer to be the big fish in the little pond. Nothing wrong with that.

I hope Speedball enjoys his triple-threat match against Matt Riddle and Bobby Fish.

All the stars are here.

But I imagine he’ll still have the freedom, if he wanted, to get into the ring with Kenny Omega.

One of Omega’s best matches in recent years was against El Hijo Del Vikingo who very much was not signed to AEW.

Mike Bailey deserves a big TV match against someone in his weight class. No offense to Moose or whatever other bums he was carrying on Impact.

5. Hologram: I love Collision—and we’ll get to that later—but I love knowing every Saturday night, we are guaranteed to see masked luchadors hitting shooting star presses while standing on another luchador’s shoulders.

What if Kenny decided he wanted to run through all of them? I know I’ve had my Latin phase in college. Shout out todos mis chicas.

Also, Beast Mortos should go without saying. Like, Kenny and Mortos should already be sitting down scripting the match.

6. Chris Jericho: Alllllright. It’s time to start retiring these egocentric geriatrics.

Chris Jericho won’t want to go out with a loss to Big Bill or Bryan Keith, although he should have already.

No, if we want Chris Jericho out of our lives then we need to make him think what he’s doing is the most important thing in the world—a feud with Kenny Omega.

Except Kenny and Tony Khan should plan some sort of Montreal Screwjob where Jericho thinks they’re planning a 30-minute banger only for Kenny to rush him with a v-trigger to the face, full force, and a quick 1-2-3 from the ref.

Then fire Jericho so we can all move on with our lives.

7. AJ Styles: Of course Kenny Omega should wrestle Will Ospreay and Okada. But an AJ Styles dream match is like, right there.

I know AJ is an older man who is essentially cashing in 6-figure social security checks signed by Paul Levesque every month who doesn’t seem to have any interest in coming into a company where he’ll have to break a sweat instead of laying on the mat for long stretches at a time while LA Knight slowly climbs the top turnbuckles and talks to each and every fan in attendance individually before a slow motion elbow drop—but Kenny Omega vs. AJ Styles would be the match of the year. More so than anything else I’ve talked about. Think about it for real. Kenny Omega and AJ Styles are two of the greatest of all time whose wrestling styles perfectly mesh for an automatic classic.

Get AJ Styles in AEW ASAP. He’s about to get eliminated from the Royal Rumble by Otis or whatever. #FREEAJ

Who should win the first-ever Women’s Gauntlet?

Let’s start by saying that whoever win this women’s gauntlet is beating Mariah May at Grand Slam in Australia next month.

It seems like AEW planned this big win for Mariah May over Toni Storm and then just sort of had nothing to do afterward.

I know injuries in the women’s division have made them pivot countless times in the middle of stories but uh, I’m not sure a super healthy Thuder Rosa was going to make an interesting rival with the lack of time Mariah May has been given to do really anything outside of wrestling Anna Jay for no reason.

So the question is more so who should be the next AEW women’s champion?

Toni Storm is a rookie. It would be miraculous if she beat all of these legendary women so quickly in her career but it’s a little soon.

I know Grand Slam takes place in her home hemisphere so she’ll be on the card doing something but the women’s title does not need to be held hostage by this Toni/Mariah story.

Go bust each other’s scalps open on a random Collison like god intended.

So here’s 3 quick finishes off the top of the dome:

1. Willow Nightingale and Kris Statlander both go for a pin and get the 3-count on separate women simultaneously so they both technically win.

I loved their 3-way match with Toni Storm on the last Dynamite.

Run it back with Mariah May at Grand Slam. Time for these two women to stop playing around with the TBS Championship and jump to the top of the card.

2. Give Mercedes Mone every single women’s championship in the world at the same time.

Fuck it.

We need the photo of this woman draped head-to-toe with every championship she can get her hands on.

Brit Baker died for this.

3. Remember Jamie Hayter? This feels like an easy way to slingshot her back to the top of the card.

Get her in the ring with 5-8 of the best women’s wrestlers in the world and have her come out the victor.

Give her the big triumphant win at Grand Slam and let the women’s champion actually matter again instead of whatever it is Mariah May is doing with Harley Cameron right now.

Oh and real quick, Athena needs to appear in this match. Let’s wrap this Ring of Honor shit up.

Booking AEW Collision with the 2004 WWE Roster

2004 was the last exciting year in WWE for me. I think Here Comes The Pain just came out on Playstation 2.

CM Punk and Bryan Danielson would have some cool moments down the road but for the most part, 2004 was end game for me.

The Rock and Stone Cold’s final year. Kurt Angle, Eddie Guererro, Rey Mysterio and Brock Lesnar were putting on weekly bangers. Goldberg and Scott Steiner were there so Triple H can punish WCW.

What a time to be alive.

Okay so in order to make an AEW Collision with the 2004 WWE roster, we need to list off what every episode of Collision need to have:

  • Squash match against local talent
  • Luchador/international talent/cruiserweight match
  • 2 women murdering each other
  • A title match where we all know the champion is retaining
  • Tag team match involving a wrestler past his prime

So let’s make an AEW Collision show with the 2004 WWE roster.

 

Unsanctioned Blood and Death Match

Molly Holly vs. Gail Kim

We’ve got two hoopers who didn’t get the love they deserved because they didn’t look like Trish Stratus or Torrie Wilson but if we dropped Molly Holly and Gail Kim into 2025 AEW Collision, they’d be powerbombing each other off the top turnbuckle onto a pile of thumbtacks for the love of the game.

Ultimo Dragon vs. Tajiri

Ultimo Dragon was kind of washed when he got to WWE but much like my idea for Mercedes Mone, once you see that photo of Dragon covered in championship belts, you convince yourself you’re watching a GOAT, regardless of whether or not they can physically move.

Tajiri would be in the AEW world title picture if he wrestled present-day instead of just showing up to spray mist in people’s faces after quick 2-minute matches fans use to re-up on chicken fingers in the arena.

Bradshaw vs. Local jobber

John Bradshaw Layfield is born in 2004. AEW uses squash matches to keep eyes on wrestlers and to keep fans excited without having them add more L’s to one of their signed performers, since wins and losses actually matter in AEW (sometimes).

JBL’s Clothesline From Hell was created to decapitate some local Des Moines 20-year old cokehead.

 

United States Championship

John Cena vs. Lance Storm

This match would be 25 minutes with an absurd number of near-falls. You’ll be scrolling your phone for ten minutes, look up and see Lance Storm just superkicked John Cena over the barricade into the front row.

 

6-man tag match

Batista, Ric Flair and Randy Orton vs. La Resistance 

Like AEW seems obsessed with, this match would entirely be focused around Ric Flair instead of the much younger talent surrounding him.

Ric Flair wins of course. And is also the Ring of Honor world champion.

I hate you, Chris Jericho.

 

 

 

 

 

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Written by thelesterlee

Creator of Deadseriousness. Diehard Knicks, Yankees and Giants fan who wants to create a sports and pop culture space that isn't the same copy and pasted AI content you see everywhere else.

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