Hey, Kike Hernandez, I Don’t Want To Party Like That

The Los Angeles Dodgers are headed to the NLCS after a big 2-0 Game 5 victory over the San Diego Padres.

Kike Hernandez hit a massive homer in the 2nd inning that gave the Dodgers a 1-0 lead which is all Yoshi Yamamoto and this unstoppable Dodgers bullpen needed to shut the Padres down.

But Kike and Gavin Lux celebrated that season-changing home run, uh, differently than I would’ve.

My baseball was Canseco and McGwire bashing forearms, today’s baseball is… this pic.twitter.com/x477cQ1Jbt

— Not Gaetti (@notgaetti) October 12, 2024

It’s a big homer. No doubt about that.

But, like, I’m good on tip-to-tipping.

We don’t have to get down like that. Nothing is that exciting. I don’t want to sword fight with my coworkers.

There’s always one guy who takes things too far. In college, I knew a guy who would get drunk and always suggest skinny dipping. Believe it or not, I’m not in a hurry to get naked with the homies, but do your thing, I guess.

Personally, I’m more of a handshake guy. Dap me up. High five if I’m around enough white people.

Not sure I’m rushing into penis slamming. Perhaps I’ve never been that happy before.

It looks like this is just who Kike Hernandez is.

Here he is in the post-game interview being the coolest, edgiest guy in all of Los Angeles:

Kiké Hernández:

“Are We Live?

The Fact that we Don’t Give a Fuck. ” pic.twitter.com/H0RP4y3zyn

— Rob Friedman (@PitchingNinja) October 12, 2024

Yea, yo. They don’t give an H-E-Double Hockey Sticks about nothing.

How are people supposed to know you don’t give a fuck if you’re not constantly telling them?

And he’s right. The team that cried about the San Diego Padres behavior in Game 2 is definitely the bad boys of the league.

They don’t give an EFFFFFFFFF. They will hit a home run and bang balls in the on-deck circle.

So badass.

Good luck to the New York Mets next round. They are going against a juggernaut that just put Slam Diego’s bats on ice and rubbed dicks after.

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