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9 Biggest Goofs of 2023 College Football Week 1

2023 college football week 1

Welcome to the biggest goofs of the week. A goof can be an embarrassing mistake. A goof can be an extraordinary achievement. A goof is any moment that stands out and is worth mentioning.

And what makes college football so great is how often people are just goofin’. From players to coaches to fans there is sooo much goofin’ in college football but let’s look at the biggest goofs in the first week of the season

1. Travis Hunter becomes a star

I was writing a Week 1 preview that didn’t get written in time for the noon kickoffs. Didn’t help that I got out of bed at 11. My bad. But it all worked out because there’s an unreleased draft back here where I celebrate TCU beating Colorado’s ass.

Thank the lord those words will never see the light of day. I can’t have Deion Sanders fans coming at me.

Travis Hunter was the star of the show playing both offense and defense, impacting both sides of the ball in a way players simply aren’t allowed to do these days.

I am going to enjoy Travis Hunter before the wheels inevitably fall off and Deion Sanders runs this kid into the ground. He played almost every single snap in 100-degree weather. By the end of the game, you could hear his ligaments through the TV.

Travis Hunter is going to be electric. Well, until every muscle in his body tears from playing every single snap every week. Let’s not get too attached. CTE is going to have Hunter going half on an Arena Football League team with Antonio Brown.

2. Urban Meyer is still too horny


Urban Meyer was fired from his last job for being too horny.

The Jaguars lost to the Bengals. Urban Meyer didn’t fly back to Florida with the team. He stayed in Ohio and went to one of his favorite bars and got lap dances from locals his daughter’s age.

Fast forward two years and Urban’s no. 1 priority remains getting his dick wet. This man is on the clock risking it all for a woman who is not his wife. Just goofin.

3. Thomas Castellanos turned into Superman

On 4th and 5 at their own 46-yard line down by two touchdowns, Boston College quarterback, Thomas Castellanos had two pass rushers in his face as soon as he dropped back.

Castellanos was chased 40 yards behind the line of scrimmage running for his life only to shake the defense and convert the most important 4th down of the game. What a goof.

4. LISTEN TO MACK BROWN

North Carolina beat South Carolina 31-17. Drake Maye vs. Spencer Rattler was supposed to be the QB battle of the year but it was kinda blah.

But NC head coach, Mack Brown, had more to say to SC head coach, Shane Beamer.

Shane didn’t realize Mack had more words to exchange and was promptly strangled by the legendary coach. But it’s all good. Mack Brown was just goofin.

 

5. Michael Penix Jr. is HIM

In Washington’s 56-19 blowout W over Boise State, Michael Penix Jr. threw for 450 yards and  5 touchdowns. MPJ was CHUCKING that shit down the field. Two Washington receivers had 100 yards. Washington tells their receivers “just run far” and Penix will find them.

*Don’t call him Michael Penis. Don’t call him Michael Penis. Don’t call him Michael Penis* GET MY MAN MICHAEL PENIS THAT HEISMAN.

 

6. Tackett Curtis is a murderer

Every week, a fanbase complains about one of their defensive stars being kicked out of a game for ‘targetting’. I didn’t see a single USC fan say a word about this Tackett Curtis hit. I wouldn’t even have a second thought if he was escorted out of the game in handcuffs like Stone Cold Steve Austin. What a goof.

7. Smoking that Dabo pack

Clemson sucks now. Nature is healing. The Tigers just lost 28-7 to a Duke team that should never be beating Clemson.

For years, Dabo used to beat up on a weak ass ACC to go undefeated every year and easily walk into the college football championship game. Well now that ACC is fighting back.

I’m sure Dabo will blame this loss on NIL and real football should be played for free while he gets paid millions. Oh no. He’s 1000% going to blame NIL, isn’t he?

8. Caleb Williams is ready for the NFL

USC beat Nevada’s ass 66-14. Caleb Williams tossed a light 5 touchdowns. I suggest we all enjoy whatever he does this season. Don’t get too excited and call him the next Patrick Mahomes. Don’t get too annoyed at how much everyone gushes over him. Stay in your own body and remember you grew up liking spectacular football players and Caleb Williams deserves to be appreciated before the NFL Draft cycle starts and the entire conversation is about all of his flaws.

9. Carson Beck

I have absolutely nothing specific to say about Carson Beck. He just looks like he’s a big goofer.

 

 

 

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Written by thelesterlee

Creator of Deadseriousness. Diehard Knicks, Yankees and Giants fan who wants to create a sports and pop culture space that isn't the same copy and pasted AI content you see everywhere else.

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