Why Does This Woman's Husband Keep Sneaking Off To Thailand Every Month?

From the moment Kliff Kingsbury got fired by the Arizona Cardinals and purchased a one-way flight to Bangkok, I’ve had Google alerts set up for the word ‘Thailand’. In my quest to track down one of the worst head coaches in modern sports history, I accidentally stumbled upon my new favorite couple.

A 70-year-old woman has shared on UK television that her husband of almost 50 years “keeps disappearing” to Thailand and sending “hundreds of pounds there monthly”.

Speaking on a segment called Dear Deirdre phone-in on This Morning, the anonymous caller who went by the name ‘Julie’ said he leaves without telling her, and is tight-lipped about where the cash is going.

His response when she inquires where he is going is equally charming. “None of your business,” she says he retorts.

It sucks that a grown adult man can’t abandon his family once a month to travel nearly 6,000 miles and explore a third-world nation while secretly wiring hundreds of dollars internationally. I completely understand why this man says it’s ‘none of your business’ whenever his wife asks.

I can’t understand why this 70-year-old woman called into an advice show and told this story as if she couldn’t fathom what her husband’s doing. Either she knows full well that her husband is devouring all-he-can-eat Thai ladyboys and called into a TV show in order to embarrass him or she just doesn’t recognize all of the jizz on his clothes when she does his laundry.

That was a crazy sentence right there. I pray this man isn’t coming back from Thailand wearing his jizzy’s.

A human who manages to stay alive for 70 years deserves the right to go blow a few hundred to blow a few hundred sex workers. However, you have to tell your wife before you come home and bring back whatever exotic STDs you’re sharing with Kliff Kingsbury and the most Thai girl you ever met whose name is “Linda” somehow.