We certainly do not condone violence here at Deadseriousness. Hashtag Cease Fire.
But sometimes you have to whoop some ass when an overserved, overconfident space invader appears.
What happened at the Pirates game?
Last night, a Pittsburgh Pirates security guard laid hands, feet (and belt), fair reaction to a wino spitting at them.
This Pirates employee fight starts with the tiny dog barking at an usher—and ends with a tiny dog getting the belt like a misbehaving son.
Pirates usher beats up fan and whips him with belt after being spit on pic.twitter.com/Vw2y5rgPR0
— Daily Loud (@DailyLoud) May 6, 2025
Again, violence is bad or whatever—but apparently, this game attendee spat on the Pirates employee, automatically granting the underpaid Pirates employee my full blessing to unstrap the belt.
Here’s what the Pittsburgh Pirates said in a statement they released following the WWF brawl at their stadium:
“We are aware of the unfortunate incident that occurred following the conclusion of (Sunday’s) game between a PNC Park gameday employee and a guest. The employee’s behavior was entirely unacceptable, and he was immediately suspended. This incident is currently under further investigation.”
This employee has been suspended and he’ll most likely be fired because a drunk idiot randomly elected to pick a fight with the wrong motherfucker.
Unfortunately, he’s not a weird white lady calling a black child the n-word, in which case, he’d be a millionaire by now, receiving donations from racists across the country, joining forces to reward one of their own.
Personally, I’d love to live in a world where you can defend yourself at work against unruly customers and your employer defends and protects you instead of punishing you but that is not the world we currently live in.
If you enjoyed what you read, head over to our Substack. We’ve got more content making fun of the ridiculous world we live in, sent directly to your email inbox daily.
Follow us over on TikTok, Twitter, Facebook or Instagram. Or shoot me an email at Deadseriousmailbag@gmail.com. Let’s chat, bay-beeeee.



