in NBA

Trade Everyone and Build Around The Twink

Plus, 3 Paul George Trade Ideas

jared mccain

I’ve been shitting on the Philadelphia 76ers since the Knicks eliminated them from the first round of the playoffs. I genuinely could not believe how many people were praising the Sixers for winning the offseason. They signed an injury-prone 34-year-old who fans sarcastically call “Playoff P” because he stinks in the playoffs and the first letter of his name is P.

Joel Embiid suffered a knee injury last season that he so clearly has not and will never recover from.

The Sixers lost 86-98 to the Orlando Magic on Friday night.

86 points.

Joel Embiid and Paul George. What a dangerous, dynamic duo.

Embiid scored 20 points on 5-for-15 shooting, 0-for-5 from 3 and turned the ball over 6 times. He was bailed out by 10 free throws. The game literally started with Embiid taking free throws.

Unethical.

Paul George scored 13 points on 4-for-15 shooting.

Defenders live in his jersey. He can only take contested shots because he can’t get any physical separation from defenders—especially against the Magic who play like pit bulls trying to get drafted by Marcus Vick.

After losing to Orlando, Philadelphia fell to 2-10. They’re the 14th seed in the East.

The Cleveland Cavaliers haven’t lost a basketball yet. The gap between the top of the conference and the Sixers grows exponentially by the day.

The Joel Embiid championship window has closed.

And that’s not to say he can never win a title but he definitely cannot win a championship as the no. 1 scoring option and highest-paid player. He physically cannot perform at the level required from someone who takes as many shots as he does and makes his salary.

I believe the Sixers could convince the New Orleans Pelicans to take Embiid. Perhaps the Miami Heat could trick themselves into believing they could get Joel in shape.

I’m not sure what the Milwaukee Bucks are doing this year but maybe they could put together some package for Paul George. Milwaukee could become an elephant graveyard for aging veterans to underperform together, wasting Giannis’s prime.

Joel Embiid and Paul George played together and the team scored 86 points.

It failed.

Tyrese Maxey there or not. Paul George’s game is just more aesthetically pleasing than Tobias Harris but both score meaningless points that don’t affect the outcomes of games.

Philadelphia can and should move off Embiid and Paul George because they just drafted their franchise superstar in Jared McCain.

Here’s what Jared McCain has done in his last 4 games:

  • 29 points, 5 threes, 4 assists, 6 fouls
  • 34 points, 6 threes, 10 assists, 2 steals
  • 23 points, 4 threes, 3 rebounds, 2 assists
  • 27 points, 3 threes, 3 rebounds, 2 assists

He’s the Rookie of the Year and at 20 years old, he’s shown he’s capable of being the leading scorer of an NBA team. A 2-win NBA team but an NBA team.

It’s insane how often NBA GMs anchor themselves to guys they know cannot stay healthy.

The New Orleans Pelicans have gotten their pants pulled down on national TV in the first round a couple times. And every year they’re shocked when Zion Williamson limps into the locker room despite everyone and their mothers acknowledging that the chubby, bo-legged boy who plays above the rim, frequently landing a ton of weight on his weak little knees would have a difficult time staying healthy.

New Orleans gave him a 5-year, $197 million contract.

And just like Philly, the Pelicans are 14th in the West as Zion has only played in half the games.

It feels like everyone is constantly complaining 24/7 these days yet no one seems to bat an eye that the Sixers keep trying to win a championship with this handicapped ogre.

I can’t spend a half hour with people before they start complaining about seeing the Kelce brothers too much but radio silence on Embiid limping up and down the court and flopping all over the floor which is astronomically more frustrating to me than Travis Kelce selling me Cheerios.

Jared McCain is 20 years old, averaging 28 points in his last 4 games. Tyrese Maxey is 24 years old and just averaged 25 points in the Sixers first-round loss to the Knicks last season, including a massive 46-point game where Embiid scored 19 points on 19 shot attempts and Kyle Lowry scored 0 in 26 minutes.

The Sixers have 2 wins right now. 2 fucking wins.

OKC currently has Philly’s 2025 first-round pick. Trade for that pick back, they can have Joel Embiid. Keep losing games and this time next season, the Sixers could be Tyrese Maxey, Jared McCain and Cooper Flagg. A potential dynasty.

This TikTok twink can revive a Sixers organization that dragged their fans through a brutal losing process to land them with an MVP-caliber center who is physically incapable of playing 3 basketball games in a week and has shown, more than enough times, that he doesn’t have the chemical makeup to will his team through a playoff series.

Actually, since we’re here, let’s cook up some interesting Paul George trades because he’s not needed here. Again, and I hope I’m stressing this enough to make myself very clear, the Philadelphia 76ers have 2 wins and 10 losses. It’s over.

Okay, here are some PG trades:

Paul George (and Philadelphia’s 2026 first-round pick) to the Oklahoma City Thunder for Isaiah Hartenstein, Isiah Joe and Philadelphia’s 2025 first-round pick.

I’m not kidding, the Sixers should get their first-round pick back and see if they can win the lottery.

Cooper Flagg is very good at basketball and unlike Joel Embiid or Paul George, Flagg’s knees work.

I feel like Paul George had a good time in OKC, or at the very least, the best it could’ve been considering he was begging Indiana to send him to Los Angeles and they sent him to Oklahoma.

I know this new Chet Holmgren injury makes Hartenstein vital to what OKC wants to do this year but Chet’s been injured a ton and the Thunder have been juuuust fine without Hartenstein on the team. Paul George will get some easy buckets for a Thunder team that I thought had some trouble in the halfcourt when the game slowed down in the postseason.

 

Paul George to the Orlando Magic for Jonathan Isaac, Cole Anthony and Gary Harris

The Orlando Magic need buckets. They rank dead last in 3-point shooting. With Paolo Banchero out, they’re turning basketball into games of Red Rover just smashing and colliding into guys, dislocating elbows and shit.

Plus it’ll be hilarious when Franz Wagner and Paul George both disappear in the playoffs.

Paul George to the Houston Rockets for Fred VanVleet, Cam Whitmore and a future first-round pick

I actually like Fred VanVleet on this Rockets team. He’s an adult in the room and a steady hand when their young players go through shooting slumps throughout the season.

But Paul George makes an absurd amount of money so I reckon this makes the contracts match.

Cam Whitmore is too talented to be playing in the G-League right now. Pair him with Tyrese Maxey and the Twink and you’re really building something that could work in the modern NBA.

And yea, trade Joel Embiid too. Jared McCain is the future and the future is now. The Sixers have 2 wins.

 

 

 

 

 

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Written by thelesterlee

Creator of Deadseriousness. Diehard Knicks, Yankees and Giants fan who wants to create a sports and pop culture space that isn't the same copy and pasted AI content you see everywhere else.

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