in NFL

Perhaps Deshaun Watson Isn’t So Bad After All

After restructuring his contract to give the Cleveland Browns more salary cap flexibility, is Deshaun Watson finally turning into a good guy?

deshaun watson

Everyone thinks the worst of Deshaun Watson and I reckon I understand why.

Before rupturing his Achilles in a Week 7 loss to the Cincinnati Bengals, Watson was 1-6 as a starter for the Cleveland Browns—always looking as if he was playing with 10-times gravity, either sailing passes above receivers’ heads or sidearming balls at their cleats—Deshaun looked like straight dogshit this season.

5 fumbles. 3 interceptions. 23.0 QBR. 1 win.

Deshaun Watson was objectively the worst player in the NFL before his season-ending injury.

I get why fans hate him. He played like he bet his entire contract on the under before every game.

I mean, he also sexually harassed 20+ women—pressuring some into intimate situations they 100% did not sign up for, like—Deshaun was in random local Houston women’s DMs looking for sex work from people who were not in any way selling sex work when he was one of the most popular players of the NFL, capable of flying in literally any type of lady (of the night) he wanted.

But more importantly, he sucks at football and has the biggest contract in the NFL. Not a winning combination for the Browns.

And after a disaster season, it appears Deshaun is stepping up to help Cleveland improve their roster by restructuring his contract and giving the Browns some more room to maneuver around the salary cap and get some more talented players in the building.

Look who finally matured and realized there’s more to life than satisfying every immediate urge you have—like begging a licensed massage therapist for a happy ending on your back with your legs up like a baby getting its diaper changed.

Perhaps the handjob burglar isn’t so bad after all.

Has Deshaun Watson finally become a good person?

Let me just check the details of this contract restructuring reaaaal quick—see how many dollars this selfless leader is leaving on the table to help the squad.

Quarterback Deshaun Watson and the Cleveland Browns have reached a contract agreement that will lessen Watson’s cap charge in future years while keeping his fully guaranteed $92 million intact, sources tell CBS Sports.

The adjustment, which is technically an extension by adding a new year to the existing contract but no new money, is intended to help the Browns field a competitive roster for 2025 and beyond. Watson has $46 million due to him over the next two years to complete the $230 million contract signed in 2022.

Oh.

No.

Deshaun Watson will not lose a single penny with this new deal.

He’s getting every dollar he doesn’t deserve except now, Cleveland is giving him an extra year of job security during what is literally the worst season of his career.

Here’s a clip Deshaun posted on his Instagram of an extremely expensive-looking dinner date with his girlfriend—who is absolutely dating him for his personality, not his ability to purchase her anything she desires. Definitely love.

This was posted, like, 3 weeks after his Achilles popped.

The man who was given the biggest contract in NFL history to lead the Cleveland Browns to a 9-10 record—missing 30 games in 3 seasons—is happily enjoying the money he robbed from this organization.

And now he’s been rewarded with a salary cap solution that not only allows Deshaun to keep every single cent of his heist money but he gets some job security on the back end for when he really falls off.

I pray Deshaun Watson and Luigi Mangione meet outside of a Midtown Manhattan hotel at daybreak.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Written by thelesterlee

Creator of Deadseriousness. Diehard Knicks, Yankees and Giants fan who wants to create a sports and pop culture space that isn't the same copy and pasted AI content you see everywhere else.

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