Lana Del Rey is a White Trash Icon

Lana Del Rey is one of the most fascinating artists of our generation.

Her first big hit, Summertime Sadness came out in 2012, one of the worst years in music history. Carly Rae Jepsen, Fun and Gotye dominated the charts.

You couldn’t leave the house without hearing “I’m Sexy and I Know It” by LMFAO. We were in hell.

And it was allllllll trash.

Flo Rida was the number-one rapper in the world.

Lana Del Rey couldn’t have picked a worse time to blow up.

You never want your bigger record to come out at the same time as “Moves Like Jagger” and “Party Rock Anthem”.

There is no cream that rises to the top. It’s all garbage floating in sewer water.

I only heard Summertime Sadness from the dance remix that was big that summer. I was outside, often, so it was in every DJ’s rotation.

As far as the rest of her songs, it always came off like fake sad, introspective bullshit made for girls who are fake sad and introspective.

She makes music for girls who say “I’m like an onion with so many layers” when in reality they have one layer and it’s annoying. Lana makes music for girls who have 20-minute stories behind the Chinese letter tattoos on their hips.

And although I just shit on her and her fans, I do feel bad about her career.

She’s stuck in this middle area where she’s big enough for me to write this article and get clicks based solely on her name being in the headline while never actually reaching the peaks of her peers like Taylor Swift or Lorde.

A decade later and she can just work a shift at the local Waffle House and no one bats an eye.

Just #LanaDelRey working at waffle house in alabama😂 pic.twitter.com/qstjHHAumW

— SayMyName (@JasourAX) July 21, 2023

Lana Del Rey working a shift at Waffle House in Alabama.

pic.twitter.com/DVfxKSqIs6

— Pop Base (@PopBase) July 20, 2023

Just look at her in that Waffle House uniform.

She looks like she’s been working there for a decade and she’s caught several thrown chairs being tossed in the midst of a weekly Waffle House brawl.

Look at that stance she’s in behind the counter. I dare you to try and push her over. She’s not going anywhere. Kevin Mawae in his prime.

She’s a natural there. You already know she used up alllll of her 10-minute smoking breaks that day.

This Lana Del Rey Waffle House day might shock some people based on the country club vibes she’s presented to the public but Lana has been a white trash icon forever.

Growing up on Long Island, I’ve seen my fair share of white trash. Lana has been showing us who she is for years. She is the prototype.

Like when she wore that mesh facemask during a global pandemic. Of course she didn’t take Covid seriously and found a way to wear some tacky bedazzled trash. This is the same woman that still shops at the mall and buy like, $15 shein dresses for major red carpets.

There’s nothing wrong with shopping at Kohls but it’s very white trash mom energy to try and present those clearance fits like they’re from an expensive boutique.

She used to date a cop which is a white trash requirement.

Since their relationship ended in 2020, she’s been engaged to two different dudes. You’re not allowed to even work at Waffle House if several men haven’t proposed to you with zero intentions of actually marrying you. It’s the first question on the job application.

I always tip-toe around the many faces of Lana—mainly because it still feels rude to point out someone’s elective surgery, especially if you don’t know how open they are about it themselves—but it’s wild how different she looks every time she emerges from her trailer park.

A true white trash legend getting the cheapest plastic surgery from a building in a strip mall next to the check cashing place and the Asian “spa” then pretending she was just born with Janet Jackson’s nose.

I’m so happy this woman was given the opportunity to work a shift at Waffle House. Maybe she can use those tips for a new inflatable front yard pool.