The Boston Red Sox haven’t finished a season above .500 since 2021. 4 years of mediocrity.

I thought this Boston winning every championhip bullshit was over.

They shot Big Papi.

The Red Sox dark magic had been vanquished.

Their team owner, John Henry, started winning championships and immediately used the additional revenue to purchase everything.

The Red Sox are an afterthought for ownership.

No serious sports organization trades Mookie Betts in his prime.

I mean, shit, he’s the type of guy you overpay long after he’s old and washed because the building is flooded with families draped in his jersey.

And somehow, they ended up with Roman Anthony—the No. 1 prospect in baseball.

Roman Anthony’s first career hit drives in two runs! pic.twitter.com/QWzbZc3Y8x

— MLB (@MLB) June 10, 2025

In his second career Major League game, 21-year old rightfielder, Roman fucking Anthony recorded his first hit and it was a 2-run double.

The Red Sox would win 3-1 over the Tampa Bay Rays. This win comes off the heels of stealing a series from the first-place Yankees over the weekend.

Boston is in 4th place, sitting at 33-36—but they’re getting a little hot—beating the Braves, Yankees and now they’re about to beat the Rays.

They have a true ace, Garrett Crochet, leading the Majors in strikeouts.

Garrett Crochet just embarsses Judge on four pitches entire at bat no cuts #RedSox #DirtyWater pic.twitter.com/wv92OZcJDA

— Lucasparmenter23 (@Lucasparmenter0) June 8, 2025

Cool.

And now this team has the best young prospect up—contributing to wins, with a cool ass name—and of course he’s handsome and he has a hot sister.

I’d like to be the first to welcome Roman Anthony’s sister to Boston! #would pic.twitter.com/pxhfJtS77T

— White Boy Carl (@TheWhiteBoyCarl) June 10, 2025

So now the perverts are going to make this woman famous so the Anthony family will have some awful Hulu reality show with an absurd marketing budget.

And you already know Roman Anthony has some uneducated political opinions someone like Adin Ross is going to squeeze out of him on some lame incel stream. I just don’t think the Anthony family respected the COVID-19 lockdown restrictions.

Roman Anthony will haunt me.

This is only the beginning.

If a time machine appeared in my living room with a gun on the floor, loaded with exactly one (1) bullet, and two dates logged into the machine, one date being Hitler’s birth and the other, Roman Anthony’s, it would take me a full week to decide where I’m taking the machine.

(But know someone else would’ve played right field last night for the Red Sox.)

 

Congrats to Roman Anthony. I already hate you.

 

 

 

Thanks for reading.

What would you do with that time machine?  Leave a comment below. Respond on Twitter, Facebook or Instagram. Or shoot me an email at Deadseriousmailbag@gmail.com. Let’s chat, bay-beeeee. 

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