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“Fuck You, Pay Me” -Kyle Tucker

Chicago Cubs star, Kyle Tucker, is in the final year of his contract so he just decided to become the best player in the baseball.

kyle tucker

As a proud Houston Astros hater, I am highly invested in their failures which includes my devotion to watching Kyle Tucker Chicago Cubs at-bats after being traded from Houston over the winter.

In 18 games with Chicago, Kyle Tuckers leads baseball with 23 hits, 19 runs scored, 8 doubles and 46 total bases with a 214 OPS+ and 18 runs batted in, to go with his 5 homers and .324 batting average.

The Cubs currently lead the NL Central with 11 wins, taking 2 of those wins off of Los Angeles over the weekend, including a 16-0 BEATDOWN. Meanwhile, the Atros are 7-8 at the bottom of the NL West. Dang.

Kyle Tucker is playing on a 1-year deal this season but he’s started so hot, he’s already in negotiations with the Cubs for a long term contract extension.

This Cubs team came into the season with ownership dumping their empty wallet upside down only for a cotton ball, an old aspirin and 3 pennies to hit the floor as they told their fans they couldn’t afford to sign someone like Alex Bregman.

Chicago most likely planned on flipping Kyle Tucker at the deadline for cash and lotto scratch-offs but these paupers have magically manifested the funds to give Tucker a potential 10-year blockbuster contract after he’s turned himself into the NL MVP front-runner.

 

With the season Tucker is about to have, it would behoove him most to wait until free agency and truly test the market so the fact he’s even sitting down for contract negotiations must mean Chicago is offering generational money.

We are on the doorsteps of one of the most historic contract years ever. I didn’t think we’d ever see anyone top Aaron Judge’s 2022 contract season where he literally hit the most home runs in a season in American League history, taking home the MVP trophy before driving the Steinbrenners to the bank and making them pay him whatever he wanted but Tucker is sitting in the middle of this Cubs lineup, forcing this team to be great despite how cheap they intended on being.

All of us should take this level of control over our finances. No matter what you do for a living, bust your ass for 3 weeks, like, make it objectively obvious who the best employee is (you), and then demand a raise.

I’m bringing Kyle Tucker’s “fuck you, pay me” energy with me everywhere I go this year. You want to advertise on Deadseriousness? That’ll be $200,000. Cash. You want me to come to your little birthday party? Cut. The. Check. Me and my guy Kyle Tucker are getting paid no matter what.

 

 

We Need To Start a GoFundMe For The Chicago Cubs

 


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Written by thelesterlee

Creator of Deadseriousness. Diehard Knicks, Yankees and Giants fan who wants to create a sports and pop culture space that isn't the same copy and pasted AI content you see everywhere else.

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