Deadseriousness Audit: 2022-23 Chicago Bulls

Welcome to the Deadseriousness Audit where we break down the season that was and preview the season to come.

The 2022-23 Chicago Bulls are 40-42 and the 9th seed in the Eastern Conference. Last season, this team finished 6th and lost in the first round to the Milwaukee Bucks. This year, they were largely irrelevant and only snuck into the play-in game because the Orlando Magic had a slow start.

What Went Right

The Bulls somehow finished 5th in defensive rating this season despite one of their best perimeter defenders, Lonzo Ball, missing the entire season with no signs of ever returning to a basketball court thanks to years of wearing sneakers made of Bounty paper towels that his dad stitched up in the basement and sold for $500 a pop.

Picking up Patrick Beverley from the junkyard at the end of the year really gave them a spark that appeared absent all season. I think this team works best when Alex Caruso and another defensive guard play alongside Zach LaVine and DeMar DeRozan so the latter two can focus almost entirely on the offensive side of the ball.

Unfortunately, the Bulls don’t really have the dollars to sign a better/younger version of Pat Bev and I don’t know if it behooves them to re-sign Beverley for a full season of him trying to make himself the center of attention.

Also feels important to point out that the LaVine/DeRozan experiment is working in that both players can co-exist without any egos messing up the vibes. LaVine understands that DeRozan is a midrange god and the ball should be in DeMar’s hands when the game is on the line.

What Went Wrong

Unfortunately, their younger players aren’t making that big leap that this team needs. Patrick Williams and Ayo Dosunmu are for sure improving incrementally every year but they aren’t coming back from the summer looking like brand new players.

They need one of these guys to become their final finished product asap before it’s time to commit to them financially because they’ll either get stuck giving a bunch of dollars to guys who are just decent role players or they won’t sign them and a different organization will get them at a discount and unlock the stars inside of them.

Nikola Vucevic and Andre Drummond helped the Bulls become one of the best rebounding teams in the NBA but man, they are nowhere near as talented at this point in their careers as their contracts would indicate.

The biggest problem with Vucevic’s game is that he takes so many shots from the perimeter and he isn’t nearly as good of a shooter as he thinks he is but at the same time, he has to stand out there because the Bulls don’t have any other shooters.

But Vuc is a free agent this summer andddd they should go their separate ways. They tried it. Eh.

Free Agency

It feels silly to say this team needs shooting because it’s the fucking NBA and every team needs shooting. Although, I guess when I write the Warriors audit in a couple weeks, I probably won’t address their need for more shooters but yea, the Bulls don’t have any of that shit.

Perhaps they can trick a team into giving up one of their shooters in a sign-and-trade for Vucevic because they do not have the cap space for a guy like Gary Trent Jr or Malik Beasley.

I don’t hate the idea of them signing a Danilo Galinari or Joe Ingles—veteran wings that can space the floor as well as handle the playmaking abilities when DeMar or LaVine is on the bench and the team needs someone else to do anything.

The Draft

The Bulls 2023-24 season is almost completely dependent on where this team lands in the draft lottery. The team still owes the Magic a first-round pick so unless the Bulls land in the Top 4, their pick goes right to Orlando. Chicago has an 8.5% chance for a Top 4 pick. That means there’s a 91.5% chance this organization is just watching the draft this summer like the rest of us.

At the end of the day, the Bulls are stuck with this roster for at least one more season. The only hope they have to compete next season is for their young players to wake up and suddenly become elite at what they do or for Lonzo Ball to wake up and suddenly feel no pain in his knee.

Otherwise, get ready for the Bulls to be in the draft lottery again this time next year.

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