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College Football Week 2 Pre-Game: Coach Prime vs. Dylan Raiola and Ashton Jeanty vs. Notre Dame

From Dylan Raiola taking on Coach Prime and his lame ass sons to Texas getting ready to make Jim Harbaugh look like Jesus, LET’S PRE-GAME

college football week 2

Welcome to the College Football pre-game where we talk about some of the big (or random) games that will be must-see TV this weekend: This week we have Coach Prime vs. Dylan Raiola and Ashton Jeanty vs. Notre Dame.

I used to love college football so this season I am forcing myself back into the game. It helps that my beloved Cornhuskers have an actual quarterback for the first time since at-home movie-playing devices were invented but the reason I’m back matters not. Let’s get into College Football Week 2.

 

 

 

Colorado (1-0) at Nebraska (1-0) (7:30 p.m., NBC)

This is the biggest football game of the year for me. Nothing Daniel Jones does on Sundays will top what my son, Dylan Raiola, did in his Nebraska debut against UTEP.

Railoa completed 70% of his passes for 238 yards and 2 touchdowns as the Cornhuskers beat UTEP 40-7.

This may be the best Nebraska team of my lifetime. And they are about to get all the smoke from Deion Sanders and Colorado.

However, this Colorado team doesn’t have all the hype of last season.

They sucked and only won 4 games.

I mean shit, they barely beat North Dakota State last week. The jig is sky-high.

It doesn’t matter if Michael Irvin and Snoop Dogg want to black out on the sidelines, Deion Sanders still needs to prove he has the fundamental ability to coach x’s and o’s and schemes and not just, like, vibes.

At a certain point, Michael Jordan’s Secret Stuff just becomes water again.

Recent history tells me Nebraska’s season is about to end in a brutal, public fashion, the way they do every time this year as the Huskers get a big nationally televised game against a top school that plays “keep away” with them for 2 hours.

Winner: Colorado

No. 3 Texas (1-0) at No. 10 Michigan (12 p.m. ET, Fox)

I just read this is only the 2nd time Texas and Michigan have EVER played each other. It’s wild that you can be labeled a historic program without ever having to face the other ones.

It was the 2005 Rose Bowl, by the way. Chad Henne vs. Vince Young. What a time to be alive.

It feels like the AP Poll is being generous putting Michigan as the 10th best team in the country simply because they won the championship last year but like. this 2024 squad ain’t the 2023 one.

Jim Harbaugh and JJ McCarthy are in the NFL. Connor Stallions is somewhere sipping a beer with Edward Snowden and the Wikileaks guy who bangs Pamela Anderson.

It’s Davis Warren’s time:

Winner: Texas

Northern Illinois (1-0) at No. 5 Notre Dame (1-0), 3:30 p.m. ET

If you’re invested in Notre Dame losing football games the way I am then I may have a tasty little for you. Welcome to the Trap Game.

Last week, North Illinois beat the dogshit out of the Western Illinois Leathernecks. QB1, Ethan Hampton, completed 90% of his passes for 328 yards and 5 touchdowns. Had a perfect QB rating. Northern Illinois won 54-15.

Notre Dame has to deal with my boy, Ethan. I’m getting in on the Ethan Hampton love before they upset the Fighting Irish and turn him into the next meme-back like Gardner Minshew.

Winner: Northern Illinois

Boise State (1-0) at No. 7 Oregon Ducks (1-0) (10 p.m., Peacock)

Oregon being in the Big 10 is absurd. But it won’t matter what conference they’re in if they keep struggling against random ass non-conference teams like their game last week against Idaho. Sure, Oregon won 24-14 but Idaho’s defense changed Oregon’s play style. The Ducks dropped from no. 3 to no. 7 and now this man is coming to their building this weekend:

Ashton Jeanty is a monster. Here’s what he did Week 1 in Boise State’s 56-45 victory over Georgia Southern:

  • 20 carries
  • 267 yards
  • 13.4 yards per carry
  • 6 touchdowns

Eat shit, Georgia Southern.

Jeanty is going to do whatever he wants against Notre Dame but Boise State let Georgia Southern put 45 points on their heads. Oregon may score 100 this weekend.

Winner: Oregon

Northern Arizona (1-0) at No. 20 Arizona (1-0), 10 p.m. ET

Honestly, those are the only 3 games I’ll be super dialed in on this weekend but I have to talk about my guy, Tetairoa McMillan, so here’s an Arizona game this week. I don’t even think it’s on national television. Good luck to the sickos.

But Arizona receiver, Tetairoa McMillion is not of this world. He is his own celestial body and we earthlings are fortunate enough to orbit around him while he bends reality, moving defenders out of his way, accelerating when he appears to already be running top speed, Tetairoa McMillion is not like us.

Here’s what McMillion did in Arizona’s 61-39 win over New Mexico:

  • 10 receptions
  • 304 yards
  • 4 touchdowns

Northern Arizona does not possess the military-grade artillery necessary to destroy an entity like Tetairoa McMillion. Get ready for him to have even crazier stats this week. 700 yards receiving is not out of the realm of possibility.

Winner: Arizona

 

 

 

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Which college football week 2 games are you most excited to watch?  Leave a comment below. Respond on Twitter, Facebook or Instagram. Or shoot me an email at Deadseriousmailbag@gmail.com. Let’s chat, bay-beeeee. Let me know if you think Daniel Jones will have success so I can steal your optimism.

 

Written by thelesterlee

Creator of Deadseriousness. Diehard Knicks, Yankees and Giants fan who wants to create a sports and pop culture space that isn't the same copy and pasted AI content you see everywhere else.

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