thelesterlee
Here’s everything I know about Chris Simms having grown up watching him fail:
- His father, Phil Simms, is one of the greatest quarterbacks in Giants history which isn’t really saying much when the other Giants QBs in the running for the no. 1 spot is turnover machine Eli Manning and Kerry Collins, who played with Randy Moss one year and didn’t have the arm strength to throw deep balls to the best deep ball receiver ever.
- In Chris Simms’s final year at Texas, the Longhorns needed to beat Texas Tech in order to have a shot at the championship game. Simms had the best game of his career. 345 yards and 4 touchdowns. Sick. Unfortunately, Kliff Kingsbury, the Texas Tech QB, also had the best game of his career throwing for 473 yards and 6 touchdowns. Texas lost.
- In his final college game, Simms threw a 99-yard pick-six.
- The Tampa Bay Buccaneers drafted him in 2003 where he would spend his time either on the bench, nearly dying on the field from a spleen rupture or having his self-esteem lit on fire by Jon Gruden.
- I think he was on the Broncos for a second.
- Somehow he has developed a brand as the guy who does the quarterback rankings every year and collectively, the internet dunks on him for his terrible annual list.
And after this week, I can now add a new bullet point to my Chris Simms knowledge: he’s a fucking scumbag.
Tua Tagovailoa donated $10,000 to the family of a recently deceased Miami Dolphins fan. There should be nothing negative to say about the kind gesture but Chris Simms somehow found a way to do the impossible.
In the clip below, you will see Chris Simms awkwardly attempting to say Tua shouldn’t have given the fan any money because the fan was mean to Simms on Twitter occasionally.
Here is the full context of Simms’ comments, and it’s not better.
He starts by saying it’s a nice gesture and a horrible thing, but then immediately goes into “he trolled me a lot.” Florio then goes into saying it’s better to be trolled than ignored because people are… https://t.co/N3VIWtZB3U pic.twitter.com/AB3UrH8GzU
— King of Phinland🐬👑 (@KingOfPhinland) June 8, 2023
Scumbag.
Chris Simms trolls Dolphins fans every year by intentionally ranking Tua lower on his QB list. Even this year, he’s ranked Tua as the 21st quarterback behind Mac Jones. The same Mac Jones who was so bad last season, he was benched.
There is nothing cornier than this guy riling up Dolphins fans every year and then crying when Dolphins fans decide to troll him back. Simms has a massive platform over at NBC Sports. For whatever reason, people respect what he has to say about quarterbacks. Of course Dolphins fans are pissed about Tua’s low ranking because there are thousands upon thousands of mindless NBC Sports consumers who now think Tua Tagovailoa sucks and that must be infuriating to deal with if you actually watch the games and root for the team and see how great he can play when his brain isn’t leaking out of his ears.
The ego and narcism of Simms to believe he should be able to make millions talking about football without ever having to experience any negative criticisms from the people he is deliberately antagonizing.
The craziest part is this scumbag truly thought he was like, standing up for the greater good. He was trying to warn us of the slippery slope and how this is a larger societal problem. Again, Simms is mad about Tua donating money to a dead Tua super fan because he doesn’t like Tua or the dead super fan.
Quick shout out to Mike Florio who eloquently explained to Simms how fortunate they are to have fans who care enough to even leave comments and replies to the things they say. I think the Trump presidency and the global pandemic reallyyy broke a lot of middle-aged white dude’s brains. I am shocked Mike Florio is a regular likable guy and not a deranged football lunatic or a scumbag like Chris Simms.
Now, if you will excuse me, I have to go finish the Deadseriousness QB rankings where I will 1000% rank Tua kind of right around where Simms did.
