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Yankees AL Wild Card Game 3. They lose, to the Boston fucking Red Sox, I’m doing a terrorism. Have no fear, Cam Schlitter is here. The rook’s got it. Let’s see the 3-1 San Francisco 49ers limp to Los Angeles to battle the 3-1 Los Angeles Rams to maintain first place in a brutal NFC West division—all teams looking playoff-bound, even Kyler’s still here. That never happens.

Mac Jones had a night.

33-for-49 passing for 342 yards and 2 touchdowns. Patrick Mahomes hasn’t thrown for more than 270 yards in a game this season yet. Mac Jones has thrown for 275+ in all 3 of his 2025 starts.

Respect restored for Mac Jones, dragging his own carcass up the field, Rams pass rushers pinballing him back and forth in the backfield, playing keep away, his feet from the Earth. Didn’t know he had it in him.

Jones, sacked once but hit 10 times; Brock Purdy—months off signing a massive 5-year, $265 million contract extension, nursing a toe injury, Mac understood; no one was coming off that bench to save the 49ers. He was the last line of defense. None shall pass. Except him. He has to pass. 49 times, apparently.

Mac, surrounded by trainers working leg cramps, pains and strains—random interns rushing to fill his esophagus with bananas, spinach to Popeye; the 4th quarter was a Call of Duty cutscene, soldiers tying tourniquets, scrambling for extra ammo, bombs bursting in air.

Every organization needs a banana peeler on the payroll. $40K starting salary. Room to grow. Apple slicers have a lot of power but the goal is to be the one who figures out how to eat a pomogranate.

Anyway, Mac sucked before the Kyle Shanahan stimulus package. 20-29 in his career before going 3-0 with San Fran,

QB2 destined.

Clipboard holding millionaire.

Life could be worse.

Hard not to imagine the first round pick, All-Star in his rookie campaign, had higher ambitions than games of catch with the kickers and punters on the sidelines.

Revived by the winds of the bay—or a coach, fueled by tranqs, visions of plays on his ceiling at night, mastering the Queen’s Gambit; Mac went band-for-band with future Hall of Famer, Matty Stafford.

Jones controlled the environment. With the score tied 20-20 in the 4th, led a 12-play drive, killing 5:12 off the clock—field goal on the board, Niners up 23-20.

5 plays later, they were on the Niners  3-yard line, well, until rookie DT, Alfred Collins, took Kyren Williams’s chain, saving the game, Kyren tears soon follow.

Field goal, Niners up 3, no sweat for Matty. LA started their next drive with just under 3 minutes left on their own 35-yard line.

In overtime, Mac crawled, scenes of a pedestrian hit by a speeding car at night, left to squirm their way to the hospital. No energy wasted. We all have “grit” and “toughness” and a “motor”, when idle. Friend’ll look you dead in the pupils, tell you they can one-v-one a silverback.

Mac Jones proved, adrenaline rushing, Empire State Building-sized stakes, career and future defined by the outcome of Thursday night’s game; he bends, nor folds. Certified crybaby bitch boy in New England, whining at refs and defenders playing too rough, publicly undermining coaches—blossomed into a hired assassin, stone cold killer, strangling the lights out of Los Angeles, slowly, for like, 3 and a half hours.

Perhaps Mac has matured, emotionally, no longer searching for scapegoats to blame for his own inadequacies—as many of us are eager to when life hands us shit. Maybe, Mac was motivated by seeing a dead body before the game…

According to The Athletic’s Dianna Russini, “That morning at the team hotel in Marina del Rey, Jones told teammates he was on his balcony when he looked out at the water and saw a floating dead body. Someone called the police. As the 49ers loaded buses for the stadium, players watched investigators and even a coroner’s van pull into the marina. On Friday afternoon, the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department said the incident was still under investigation.” (Source)

Mark Sanchez must’ve been in town.

I’ve seen enough to know this guy is a QB1 in the same league where Joe fucking Flacco and Russell Wilson get to MJ Washington Wizards, year after year, with diminishing returns.

I’m too online.

I’m attempting to build emotional barriers to protect myself from the screaming-in-your-face loud contrarians—but type Kirk Cousins into your go-to brain-evaporating app, no labor finding “Kirk Cousins should start” posts. The opioid crisis isn’t over.

Mac Jones, 3-0 with 905 passing yards—more than Lamar Jackson and Baker Mayfield (both played 1 more whole ass game than Mac)—6 touchdowns to 1 interception. Walked down the LA Rams in their crib on national TV.

Why am I watching Carson fucking Wentz right now?

Kendrick Bourne again

Speaking of careers at crossroads—30-year-old receiver, Kendrick Bourne, needed a TNF showcase. In 2021, both Mac and Kendrick arrived in New England, lost, weekly, abandoned in front of the local firehouse by a sundowning mascot and his hospice nurse, adopted by Kyle Shanahan—the two formed Voltron for fun.

Deebo Samuel shipped to Washington. George Kittle, Brandon Aiyuk, Ricky Pearsall, Jauan Jennings; injured—watching from the sidelines. Doesn’t matter.

Bourne erupted, 10 receptions and 142 yards, 5 catches and 63 yards in the 4th quarter.

Kendrick signed a 1-year deal with San Fran last offseason. Put on a combine, displaying his route-running prowess, improved hands, confidence. Teams will remember that one Thursday Kendrick Bourne was good. Another bag, secured.

 

 

Just Play Shedeur Sanders

 


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Lester Lee

Creator of Deadseriousness.com, The Last Sports Blog.

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