5 NBA Head Coaches Who Have No Idea What They're Doing

There are a handful of coaches who have tricked us into believing they are some of the best coaches in the NBA by winning championships or having deep playoff runs but this season is exposing a lot of truths.

Before we point out the frauds, it’s important to talk about what separates the great coaches from the rest.

Players buying into your program.
Young players developing into true, usable NBA players.
Smart lineups that make sense and every player knows their role.
Winning games. Duh.

It’s time to shine a light on some guys who don’t know what they’re doing this year.

Honorable mention: Adrian Griffin

I’m just keeping an eye on AG. Recently, the Bucks look far better than they did to begin the season but if Milwaukee doesn’t make it to the NBA Finals, we know who to blame. Giannis and Dame should be able to put any team away but again, just something to keep an eye on.

Here are the 5 NBA head coaches who secretly have no idea what they’re doing:

1. Rick Carlisle

The Indiana Pacers are ahead of schedule this season.

Tyrese Haliburton and them boys are balling out every night. It feels like they beat the brakes off the Milwaukee Bucks like, once a week. So I hesitated to put Rick Carlisle on this list for leading an overachieving and exciting Pacers squad.

But then I realized they were ranked 28th in defensive rating. They have a worse defensive rating than the DETROIT PISTONS. The Pistons win about one basketball game a year and they play better defense than Carlisle’s Pacers.

Now, Indiana also has the no. 1 offensive rating in the NBA so I get it.

Their plan is to allow opposing teams to score whenever and however they want so they can quickly get the ball back and rush up the court for a quick bucket.

But the Pacers would have to shoot 100% from the field to make up for the easy layups they consistently give up defensively

Like, even Mike D’Antoni pretended to care about defense enough to play guys like Raja Bell, Shawn Marion and PJ Tucker.

Every night, Rick Carlisle watches Obi Toppin get sonned by every big man in the NBA and Carlisle is like ‘I have to play this kid 30 minutes. I have to.’

2. Darvin Ham

I mean, this article was inspired by Darvin Ham and his inability to put together a competent starting lineup around Anthony Davis and LeBron James. Earlier this week, the Lakers lost 96-110 to the Miami Heat mainly because a zone defense handcuffed them.

COACH, we need you to make some adjustments, man.

Honestly, I have to get this article out as soon as possible because Darvin Ham might be unemployed before I finish this list.

The Lakers are on a 3-game losing streak.

They’re a game below .500.

This team was in the Western Conference Finals last year and they just shot 4-for-30 from the 3-point line on Wednesday night. A zone defense turned the Lakers into the local JV team.

3. Monty Williams

The 2023-24 Detroit Pistons now hold the record for the longest losing streak in NBA history.

They have 3 wins. It’s January. They have 3 wins.

Monty Williams is the second highest-paid coach in the league and the Pistons have 3 wins.

The roster is stuffed with former lottery picks and every night they look like they have never heard of the game of basketball before arriving at the arena and had the rules quickly explained to them moments before the opening tip.

Ausar Thompson was drafted with the No. 5 overall pick last summer and has shown flashes of real NBA brilliance. A guy who can star in whatever role that’s given to him.

And he just played 11 minutes in an OVERTIME loss to the Utah Jazz this week.

This team plays no defense¹ and a guy like Ausar Thompson who’s shown he cares about the defensive side of the ball can’t even get playing time for a 3-win team.

The fuck are we doing, Monty?

This is the same Monty Williams who went to war with DeAndre Ayton when he was coaching the Suns. He seems like the type of guy who makes decisions based on random, arbitrary bullshit like whatever he’s feeling when he wakes up in the AM affects the way he coaches which is something terrible coaches do.

Monty Williams gets insane direct deposits every week so there is nothing these players can tell him.

I hope he’s enjoying all the power he has in Detroit because once this rebuild is done and they fire him for a real head coach, Monty is never getting one of these jobs again.

You simply cannot go on the biggest losing streak in NBA history and just like, coach the Charlotte Hornets in a couple years. Nah. It’s over for Monty.

4. Gregg Popovich

After watching Victor Wembanyama and Giannis Antentkoumpo square off on Thursday night, I am offended by how Gregg Popovich has elected to coach this team.

This is such a ridiculous highlight real from a single game pic.twitter.com/5T1VckBAMu

— Knicks Memes (@KnicksMemes) January 5, 2024

Victor Wembanyama could be in the MVP conversation at the end of the year.

He is already one of the best players in the league.

But Gregg Popovich spent most of this season letting Jeremy Sochan go out there and play point guard despite having zero playmaking skills and horrible court vision and a mediocre handle.

It’s as if Pop is intentionally handicapping Vic to get him acclimated to the NBA life as slow as possible and to reduce our expectations of him but fuck that.

He’s 7-foot-40.

His career will 1000% be poisoned by injuries.

Whenever Wembanyama is healthy enough to play basketball, his games should be treated like must-win events.

It is far more likely for Vic to become Greg Oden or Yao Ming spending all his time on crutches than it is for him to have a 20-year career where he plays 82 games every season.

Pop will pay for his sins if Wemby never gets a playoff run because he’s out here sharing the floor with guys who wouldn’t get picked to play at their local LA Fitness.

5. Steve Kerr

Steve Kerr trick y’all.

Kerr walked onto a ready-made playoff team after Mark Jackson fumbled the ball at the 1-yard line.² Steph Curry and Kevin Durant carried this man to championships but over the last couple of years, Kerr has been exposed as a scammer.

Steph Curry missed the 2019-20 season. Golden State won 15 games and ended up with the No. 2 pick. Instead of using that pick to trade for a potential star to pair with Curry as Draymond gets older and significantly less athletic and Klay Thompson comes off multiple leg injuries, the Warriors chose to draft James Wiseman.

The team would gather young talents like James Wiseman, Jordan Poole, Jonathan Kuminga and Moses Moody and do absolutely nothing with them.

None of them got better.

None of them ever cracked the starting 5 or gained consistent minutes. Half of them are on different teams and the other half is currently texting Shams to complain about Kerr.

Steve Kerr is all vibes but when it comes to the X’s and O’s, he might be the most overrated ever. I, too, could coach the 3 greatest shooters in NBA history and the most versatile defender of his generation to a couple rings. Let me coach the Warriors. I can find some Moses Moody minutes.