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Zach Randolph Choked a Bitch

Is Zach Randolph Gonna Have to Choke a Bitch? Yes, Apparently..

In breaking the news, TMZ cited a report filed with the Los Angeles Police Department on Thursday morning. Sources told TMZ the woman claimed “to have a black eye, multiple bruises on her back, a sprained neck and sore ribs.”Bleacher Report

 

Yikes. Zach Randolph is on the tail end of his career. This season is statically one of his worst seasons in a decade. Some people cope with drugs. Others with alcohol. Zach Randolph however, chokes bitches out.

I don’t want to defend Randolph. You like, totally can’t hit women and stuff. Having said that, if chicks in Memphis don’t want their neck wrung then they should’ve taken the time to vote him into the NBA All-Star game. Without those accolades, Randolph’s leash is off. No girl is safe unless Randolph makes an All-NBA team.

What’s crazy is that Marc Gasol is out for the season. Zach Randolph is out choking bitches. Matt Barnes is fist fighting head coaches. Lance Stephenson is in the locker room blowing kisses at everyone. With all of that going against the Grizzlies, the team is only 5th in the Western Conference.

The Memphis Grizzlies are failing up and as a guy who tries to do the least amount of work and fall into opportunities that I didn’t earn, I’m team Memphis. Fake it, til you make it.

 

Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you’re team Memphis too.

Written by TheLesterLee

TheLesterLee

Creator and King of Deadseriousness. Writer of all things pop culture.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk to the king directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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