I don’t want to put anyone into a sour mood but there’s a 1000% chance that your girlfriend is currently texting some other guy right now. It’s [whatever year you are currently reading this], everyone and their mothers is texting 24/7.
You’re a fool if you think you’re the only guy in your girl’s inbox.
Now, I’m not at all implying that your girlfriend is cheating. I’m sure she likes your hilarious Vin Diesel impression or whatever so no worries, you’re safe. That super original and unique ‘Corona-Virus’ joke was fire. Trust me.
But don’t be naive. Your girl is getting eggplant emojis splattered on her phone from the moment she wakes up to the second she goes to bed. Oh, also all through the night. There are guys drunk texting ‘you up?’ while she’s lying next to you.
These are just facts.
How do I know this? Because I’m one of the guys texting your girlfriend.
If I were to go down the list of all the girls I’ve hooked up with, I’d say about 9/10 of them had boyfriends at the time. I’m obviously not proud of that and I haven’t fact-checked any of these raw statistics but I’m just here to help you guys out.
If your girlfriend has a bunch of stories to tell you about that guy she works with, there’s a 1000% chance that son of a bitch is texting your girlfriend. Whether he’s trying to hump her or not, he should probably back off and respect your relationship but instead, he’s sending her Uncut Gems memes all morning. And soon, he’s going to be sending his little uncut gem on Snapchat.
Oh, is she complaining about that guy who sits next to her in class? Yup, he added her on Facebook and for sure backflipped into her DMs immediately. Your girlfriend definitely ran into her ex a month ago and he’s been texting her ever since.
So what’s the next step? What do you do with this information?
First of all, you should pat yourself on the back. You should be proud of yourself for having a girlfriend that other guys find attractive. She’s obviously not some trophy for you to show off because she is her own individual self with her own motives, goals and dreams independent of you but you don’t want some slumpbuster in your arms, amirite fellas?!?!?
Also, think about it really quickly. Do you reaaaally enjoy texting your girlfriend all day long? Trick question: of course you don’t.
Yes, of course you love talking to your girl and exchanging ideas but if some other guy who stands no chance with her decides to do the dirty work of hearing about how ‘cold’, ‘tired’ or ‘hungry’ is then just let it happen.
Your girlfriend is texting other guys.
It’s not the end of the world and it’s nothing that you should be worried about but it’s definitely something you should be aware of. I mean, she might be cheating (probably) but now you won’t be surprised when you find out.
Thank me later.
Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think your girlfriend is texting other guys. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.
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