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Guy Arrested For Throwing a Cookie At His Girlfriend

A Pasco County man is facing a domestic battery charge after his girlfriend accused him of throwing a cookie piece at her over the weekend.

Deputies were called to the couple’s home on Midland Street in Zephyrhills around noon on Sunday.

When they got to the scene, the victim told deputies 41-year-old Wade Smith threw a hard piece of cookie and hit her in the forehead.

In an arrest report, deputies noted that the victim had a red mark on the top of her forehead in her hairline.

Deputies say Smith admitted to throwing the cookie at the woman without her consent. (Source)

Now before we get into this, I want to make it extremely clear that we do not condone domestic violence here at Deadseriousness. Solve your problems with words. Or just break up. But keep your fucking hands to yourself.

And that goes double with cookie throwing.

What a disgusting act. The police couldn’t have arrived soon enough. I’d like to imagine that Wade Smith had another Chips A’hoy in his hand when the cops kicked the door in. Lock him up and throw away the key before someone truly gets hurt. This is a prelude to the next season of Mindhunter.

Part of me is glad that in the end, at least Smith was able to admit that he threw the cookie ‘without her consent’. Everyone knows if you’re going to do an act like that, you have to get the Mrs. to sign on the dotted line first. It’s 2019, after all. #MeToo.

It’s just good to know that this cookie monster is off the streets.

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Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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