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Virginia Congressional Candidate Denver Riggleman Is Suuuuuuuper Into Bigfoot Porn

LESLIE COCKBURN OFF THE TOP ROPE ON A QUIET SUNDAY NIGHT MY GOD.

Pack it up, Denver Riggleman. You’re done. Ms. Cockburn just found your secret fetish. Wave the white flag before someone gets hurts.

Here is the original Instagram post from Riggleman off that weird ass photo:

Riggleman says that this Instagram photo is a ‘joke’ and I totally don’t blame him. I say the same exact thing when I post something and only get 21 Likes on it. It’s just a goof. But apparently, it was a little more than a joke for Riggleman who also made Facebook pages promoting a creepy Bigfoot like, dating guide.

 

The Cook Political Report, which analyzes elections across the country, said Riggleman recently deleted a Facebook author page in which he was promoting his self-published book, “The Mating Habits of Bigfoot and Why Women Want Him.”

Cockburn’s campaign manager referenced the Facebook page and the political report to take a shot at Riggleman.

“Leslie has been traveling throughout the district meeting with real people about real issues that matter to them,” Louise Bruce said in a statement to the Daily Progress, a newspaper in Charlottesville, Va. “Meanwhile, Mr. Riggleman is home scrubbing his social media of ‘Bigfoot erotica’ and who knows what else.”

(NY Post)

 

 

Sooo, Denver Riggleman lost this race, right?

I know nothing about what Leslie Cockburn is running on. I know not of her policies or plans. But I do know three very important things about her which automatically gives her my vote.

1. Cockburn is a last name that I will be saying in my head every 7 seconds for the rest of the month, at least.

2. She doesn’t seem to have any Internet history of wanting to bang Bigfoot, unlike her opponent.

3. Apparently she’s Olivia Wilde’s mom?!

 

Denver Riggleman better like, adopt Megan Fox or change his last name to Rigglecock or else he’s going to receive zero votes.

Shout out to Leslie Cockburn for putting an end to all of that lame ‘they go low, we go high’ nonsense. Nah b. We’re dealing with white supremacists who want to bang Bigfoot. There are no more rules.

 

 

 

Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think Leslie Cockburn is a political genius. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.

TheLesterLee

Written by TheLesterLee

Created Deadseriousness after being fired from every job I've ever had. One faithful night I drew the conclusion that if I was going to be unemployed, I might as well write articles that will guarantee I am un-hireable going forward. This website is the equivalent to a face tattoo.

E-mail Lester@Deadseriousness.com to talk directly about all Deadseriousness related stuff or if you just want to talk about like, the Yankees or Marvel comics or whatever.

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