The Undertaker is 54 years old. Bill Goldberg is 52. For whatever reason, the WWF decided to finally have these two have a one-on-one match about 18 years too late and the result was two geriatric men murdering each other.
Basically, these two elderly men spent the bulk of the match just dropping the other directly onto their necks like they were drunk backyard wrestlers on a trampoline.
Wow, no way. You mean after they tried to end each other’s lives they had an argument about it? That’s nuts. It’s almost as if they had no business in a match in the first place.
Don’t be shocked to read a story later this week about The Undertaker needing spinal surgery or Goldberg having concussions. Goldberg’s head hit literally everything. The entire match was just Goldberg slamming his skull on shit.
RIP both of these men. They just cut a decade off their life expectancy for Triple H to hand them a check that won’t clear for a month and will be used directly to pay for their medical bills.
Stay Tuned for this year’s Wrestlemania where 70 year old Ric Flair takes on 65 year Hollywood Hulk Hogan for the right to say the N-word.
sidenote: I had a typo where I called Goldberg ‘Oldberg’ and I laughed for three consecutive minutes. You guys deserve to know that.
- Kawhi Leonard Is a Genius For Teaming Up With Paul George in LA
- Kamala Harris Wears Shoes Wow, She’s Just Like Us!!!!!
- Celebrating Steve Cohen Purchasing The New York Mets Is So Fucking Weird
- 5 Takeaways From New York Giants Week 1 Loss To The Pittsburgh Steelers
- ICE Is Performing Forced Hysterectomies To Detained Women And It’s Time To Burn America To The Ground