Corner: “No, no, no, no.”
— #UFCChile: Maia vs. Usman on BT Sport (@btsportufc) May 13, 2018
Raquel Pennington got fuuuuucked up over the weekend by Amanda Nunes, the defending Bantamweight Champion and it wasn’t even close. My girl Raquel doesn’t have a face anymore. Her nose is broken and her eyes are swollen shut but that didn’t stop her trainer for sending her out there for one last round to finish what she started.
“I know it hurts. Let’s power through this. Let’s power through this, let’s believe. Change your mindset. Change your mindset. Let’s throw everything we got. We’ll recover later … Throw everything we got,”
“Let’s power through this” as if he’s the motherfucker whose face is spilling blood like a faucet. Pennington was seconds away from climbing over that fence and crawling to the Emergency Room but her trainer was waiting on the other side with a taser like Ann Down in the Handmaid’s Tale.
“Change your mindset” yo, being a trainer is a complete scam which is why I am officially announcing that Deadseriousness will be pivoting away from media and transforming into a personal fitness company. Simply send me your life savings and I will scream at you when you’re tired and call you fat while you’re eating. Venmo me.
“We’ll recover later” is hilarious. Yes, your bones are broken and you most certainly have permanent brain damage, I mean look at you, I think your brain stem is falling out of your ears, but like, that’s a problem for later. Go out there and win this fight. She won’t expect you to throw your dead body at her. She’ll be totally caught off guard.
Anyone need a trainer, hire me.
Thanks for reading. Tweet to @TheLesterLee if you think Raquel Pennington should probably like, look for a new trainer. Also, go ahead and throw Deadseriousness a Like on Facebook so that I can keep the lights on around here at HQ.